Introvert Power

"It changed my life. No kidding. Dr. Helgoe's book opened the door to discovery that has helped free me be myself." - Sophia Dembling, author of The Introvert's Way: Living a Quiet Life in a Noisy World "Like a modern-day Thoreau, psychologist Laurie Helgoe leads us to a tranquil Walden Pond within our soul, and shows us the blessings of solitude we can find there." - Stephen Bertman, author of The Eight Pillars of Greek Wisdom "I love Laurie Helgoe's book. I just wish I'd had it when I was growing up; it would have reduced the number of decades it took me to treasure my own introversion. Now as I read each page I'm saying "Yes!"" - Josephine Humphreys, novelist and winner of the American Academy of Arts and Letters Award in Literature "Extroverts have to read this remarkable book too. It's not just that we'll better understand the other 50 percent of the population but that they have so much to teach us. The party always ends, after all. Being alone is unavoidable. Helgoe and the introverts among us know a secret: It's after all the music and dancing stops that we often become our most graceful selves." - Ethan Watters, author of Crazy Like Us: The Globalization of the American Psyche "Laurie Helgoe's Introvert Power is The Bhagavad Gita for introverts....Laurie fans the embers of wisdom in each of us to honor yearnings that serve as both compass and anchor. I'm now giving myself permission to get a lock for my office door and replace my reading chair with something that would delight my younger self. I owe it to her." - Mary Hershey, author for children & young adults, co-creater of Shrinking Violets, Marketing for Introverts ""Most Americans, whether introverted or extroverted, have learned to look like extroverts," writes psychologist (and introvert) Heilgoe in this well-written and well-reasoned analysis that challenges the perception of introverts as a silent, problematic minority... Readers will find much insight, as well as a comforting sense of being understood and validated." - Publishers Weekly, STARRED review

Laurie Helgoe, PhD, is a writer, psychologist, part-time actor, and modeland introvert. This is her fifth book.

CONTENTS Preface to the Second Edition Introduction America the Extroverted Introversion for All-or None The Big Lie Reviving Your Introversion What's Inside Introvert Voices Part I: Antisocial, Weird, or Displaced? Chapter 1: The Mistaken Identity The Opposite of Social Is Not Antisocial The Opposite of Social Is Not Introverted We Are Not Snobs Introversion Is Not a Diagnosis The Abandonment of the Internal We Are Introverts Chapter 2: Alone Is Not a Four-Letter Word The Culture of More The Threat of Solitude Introversion Interrupted The Fear of Solitude The Courage to Be Alone Chapter 3: Becoming an Alien Alien Society or Alien Self? Shadow Dwellers: Goths, Geeks, and Fantasy Freaks No Place to Hide: The Accessible Introvert The Setup The Third Option Chapter 4: "Anyone Else IN?" The Extroversion Assumption Finding Introverts A New Assumption Where the (Inner) Action Is My Space in Cyberspace Chapter 5: The Get-Happier Mandate Put on a Happy Face Unhappy Pursuit The Right to Pursue Answers Happy to Fit In The "S" Word Inventing Depression, Prescribing Happiness The Downside of Up I'll Have What I'm Having Part II: The Introvert's Wish List Chapter 6: Meditating with the Majority: The Introverted Society Norden: Private and Proud Japan: Manners over Mouth Introvertia Chapter 7: A Room of Your Own Your Dream Room From Dream to Real Room Outside Office Space Chapter 8: The Time to Think Time Poverty The Ticking Bomb Model From Deadline to Birth Time Nature's Rhythm, Society's Rhythm The Rhythm of Introversion Chapter 9: The Right to Retreat What Is a Retreat? How Do I Know When to Go? A Society in Search of Introversion Overruling the Objections Retreat Dreams Mini-Retreats Chapter 10: The Freedom of a Flaneur The Artist's Eye Among, Yet Alone Flneurie 101 Your Invisibility Cloak Chapter 11: Inroads to Intimacy Intimacy through Ideas Sticking It Out Going Deep Part III: Standing Still in a Loud World Chapter 12: The Conversation Conundrum The Risk of Playing Slowing It Down Conversation Preparation Music to Our Ears Chapter 13: The Anti-Party Guide "No" Is an Option Pros and Cons Establishing Your Terms Introverting at the Party Chapter 14: Why Did I Want to Work with People? Doing Versus Thinking What is Work? A Culture of Interruption Introvert Exploitation Changing Your Mind Idea Inc Leading, Introvert-Style Chapter 15: The Downside to Self-Containment The Lonely Hearth A Limited View Self-Reproach Stale Air Loss of Community Chapter 16: Showing Up for Relationships The Problem of Family Introversion and Intimacy Loving Our Extroverts Relationship Assessment Part IV: Outing the Introvert Chapter 17: From Apology to Acceptance-and Beyond Apologies, Explanations, and Excuses The Place for Apology Introvert Integrity Chapter 18: Celebrating Introversion Life in the Dark Introverts Are Cool Wide Receivers The Yin Celebration Chapter 19: Expressing What's In There Writing It Out Beyond Words Having the Stage Introversion Diversions Chapter 20: Moshing on Your Own Terms Meeting Your Opposite Learning from Our Extroverts Organic Expansion Extroverting for Energy The Paradox of the Pit Chapter 21: Introvert Power Tribute to an Introvert Meditating in Your Mosh Pit Bibliography Acknowledgments About the Author