- Sometimes its better to finish last and have 99 people cheering for you, than to finish first and have to stand there all alone. - A liar tells the truth every time he lies. - When someone pulls out a camera, dont ask them to take a picture of you. - If you dont think its funny, dont laugh. - Control your animals and your children!- Stop quoting people when you dont know what youre talking about. - Live your funeral every day.