Social Intelligence

Dr. Karl Albrecht is a management consultant, executive advisor, futurist, researcher, speaker, and prolific author. In his twenty-five-year career he has worked with many kinds of businesses, government, and nonprofit organizations in a wide range of industries world-wide. He has consulted with senior executives and lectured to conferences on all inhabited continents. He is the author of more than twenty books on various aspects of individual and business performance, including Brain Power: Learn to Improve Your Thinking Skills; The Northbound Train: Finding the Purpose, Setting the Direction, Shaping the Destiny of Your Organization; The Power of Minds at Work: Organizational Intelligence in Action; and co-author of the best-selling Service America!: Doing Business in the New Economy, widely credited with launching the “customer revolution” in the U.S. and abroad, which has sold over a half-million copies in seven languages. He devotes much of his effort to finding and developing promising new concepts for both organizational and individual effectiveness. His research and development activities have spanned a wide range of issues, from individual creativity all the way to corporate strategic vision. He is widely regarded as a key thought leader in the field of emerging strategic business issues. He can be contacted at www.KarlAlbrecht.com.

• Foreword viiAcknowledgment ixPreface xi1. A Different Kind of “Smart” 1Old Wine in New Bottles? 3Going Beyond IQ 6EI, SI, or Both? 10From Toxic to Nourishing 12Blind Spots, Lenses, and Filters 14Social Halitosis, Flatulence, and Dandruff 16The “Dilbert” Factor 23Can We Become a Socially Smarter Species? 25S.P.A.C.E.:The Skills of Interaction 282. “S” Stands for Situational Awareness 33Situational Dumbness and Numbness 34Ballistic Podiatry: Making the Worst of a Situation 36Reading the Social Context 38What to Look For 40The Proxemic Context 41The Behavioral Context 47The Semantic Context 51Navigating Cultures and Subcultures 58Codes of Conduct: Violate the Rules at Your Peril 61Building the Skills of Situational Awareness 663. “P” Stands for Presence 69Being There 70Is Charisma Over-Rated? 72Do Looks Matter? 75Reading (and Shaping) the “Rules of Engagement” 75The Ugly American Syndrome 78More of You, Less of Me 80A Case of Attitude 82Building the Skills of Presence 854. “A” Stands for Authenticity 87Take a Tip from Popeye 88It’s a Beautiful Day in the SI Neighborhood 90The Snap-On Smile: Can You Fake Sincerity? 93Left-Handed Compliments 94The Puppy Dog Syndrome 97Narcissism: It’s Really All About Me 98Head Games, Power Struggles, and Manipulation 102Building the Skills of Authenticity 1055. “C” Stands for Clarity 107A Way with Words 108Hoof-in-Mouth Disease: Sometimes Silence Works Best 110Role-Speak and Real-Speak 114Helicopter Language and Elevator Speeches 116“Clean” Language and “Dirty” Language 119Verbal Bludgeons 121Taking a Brain for a Walk 125The Power of Metaphor 128E-Prime: the Language of Sanity 130Building the Skills of Clarity 1356. “E” Stands for Empathy 137What Destroys Empathy? 138What Builds Empathy? 142The Platinum Rule 147The Irony of Empathic Professions 149L.E.A.P.S.: Empathy by Design 152Empathy in Four Minutes 154Building the Skills of Empathy 1567. Assessing and Developing SI 159Assessing Your Interaction Skills 160Self-Awareness: Seeing Yourself as Others See You 166Assessing Your Interaction Style: Drivers, Energizers, Diplomats, and Loners 168The Strength-Weakness Irony 177Priorities for Improvement 1808. SI in the World of Work: Some Reflections 185The Real and Legal Consequences of Social Incompetence 184Cultures of Conflict and Craziness 187Hierarchies,Testosterone, and Gender Politics 193Getting it Right at Work and Wrong at Home 198The Diversity Puzzle 200Ritual, Ceremony, and Celebration 203Positive Politics: Getting Ahead with Your Value System Intact 2079. SI in Charge: Thoughts on Developing Socially Intelligent Leaders 211The S.O.B. Factor 212Executive Hubris: Its Costs and Consequences 216Best Boss,Worst Boss 219P.O.W.E.R.:Where It Comes From, How to Get It 222How the Worst Bastards on the Planet Get and Keep Power 224The Algebra of Influence 226S.P.I.C.E.: Leading When You’re Not In Charge 22710. SI and Conflict: Thoughts About Getting Along 233The Double Spiral of Conflict 234Why Argue? 241Crucial Conversations 243Added Value Negotiating 246Epilogue. SI and the Next Generation: Who’s Teaching Our Kids? 253Our Children Are Not Our Children 254The (Only) Ten Basic News Stories 256Anxiety Drives Attention 260Breaking the Addiction to Television 262The Buying of Our Babies 265Video Games:The New Sandlot 267Teachers, Parents, or Neither? 270Belonging or Be Longing? 272The S.P.A.C.E. Solution for Schools 276A Prescription for SI at Every Age 278Index 281About the Author 289