Communication as an Art of Living

Bernhard Poerksen is Professor of Media Studies at the University of Tübingen, Germany. He has a particular research interest in the new media age and has written about systemic thinking. His most recent book publication in English is Digital Fever: Taming the Big Business of Disinformation (2022).Friedemann Schulz von Thun is Professor Emeritus at the University of Hamburg. Germany. He became widely known for his trilogy Miteinander reden (Let’s Talk!), which has long been considered a standard work in the field of communication. Since 2007, he has directed the Schulz von Thun Institute for Communication. He holds an honorary doctorate in Economics from the University of St. Gallen and is still active as a consultant and coach. His bestselling books are among the most widely read works of psychology in the German-speaking countries.

“This book brings into view the programmatic core of humanistic psychology. Rather than focusing on defects, deficiencies, and pathologies, it recognizes and concentrates on opportunities for personal growth and on human potential. Bernhard Poerksen and Friedemann Schulz von Thun offer communication tools for everyone – paving the way toward better communication and perhaps also to a better life. Fascinating.”Michael Murphy, Co-founder of Esalen Institute, the birthplace of the Human Potential Movement

• Praise for the German EditionPrefaceThe Dialogic Principle: A Preface by Bernhard PoerksenI. The Big Questions 1. The Communication SquareSearching for the key sentenceThe power of the receiverHermeneutics of the listenerIn praise of misunderstandingHistory of an ideaOf humans and machinesApplication of a model2. Maxims of ComprehensibilityThe practice of parodyThe four comprehensibility dimensionsKarl Popper’s tauntsThe three-world typologyThe limits of communication3. Vicious Circles and Relationship DynamicsNo beginning and no endVictims and perpetratorsPower comes from obedienceNo more either-orThe simultaneity of different thingsAutonomy and dependenceThe double focusTheory and biography4. The Ideal of CongruenceThe narcissistic dilemmaThe primal need of the soulAbraham Maslow’s rantMaximum and optimum authenticityTrue to self and situationThe situation modelHigher-order sovereigntyFrom norm to optionLeading a congruent life5. Communication with the Inner SelfThe parallelism propositionSelf-paralysis and self-sabotageThe charisma puzzleStages of self-clarificationA pluralism-friendly attitudeAgainst exileThe power of metaphor6. The Values Square and Views of Human NatureThe third qualityA guide to dialectical thinkingFarewell to one-sidednessVarieties of integrationHuman natureFreedom and conditionabilityStanley Milgram’s experimentII. The Concrete Questions1. Communication Psychology for Managers and ExecutivesDouble-vision consultancyTriple pressureThe integral leaderHigher-order compromiseThe values square as feedback squareExplicit and implicit meta-communicationCompetition means dependence2. Communication Psychology for TeachersFreedom and coercionOne child’s school experienceThe construction of self-imagesTraining the swan perspective3. Communication Psychology and the Construction of Reality in Intercultural CommunicationThe ambiguous kissJustifying the normFirst- and second-order realityUnderstanding versus refutationIII. The Last Questions1. Happiness and DeathThe end of communicationSelf-determination and acceptance of fateVicious and virtuous circlesThe certainty of uncertaintySearching for Congruence in Communication and Life: An Afterword by Friedemann Schulz von ThunSelected BibliographyAbout the Authors