Bury My Heart at Chuck E. Cheese's

Tiffany Midge is a citizen of the Standing Rock Sioux tribe and was raised in the Pacific Northwest. She is a former columnist for Indian Country Today and taught writing and composition for Northwest Indian College. Midge’s award-winning books include The Woman Who Married a Bear and Outlaws, Renegades, and Saints: Diary of a Mixed-Up Halfbreed. She resides in Moscow, Idaho, where she has served as the city’s poet laureate. Geary Hobson is an emeritus professor of English at the University of Oklahoma. He is the author of numerous books, including The Last of the Ofos.

“This uproarious, truth-telling collection of satirical essays skewer[s] everything from white feminism to ‘Pretendians’ to pumpkin spice. Midge, a member of the Standing Rock Sioux Tribe, muses bitingly on life as a Native woman in America, staring colonialism and racism in the face wherever she finds them, from offensive Halloween costumes to exploitative language. This collection’s deliciously sharp edges draw laughter and blood alike.”-Adrienne Westenfeld, Esquire “Midge is a hilarious satirical essayist and nonfiction writer, and her work brings all the laughs. But they are ‘thinky’ laughs, because the humor doubles back on itself and makes you see so much about modern Native American life in a new way.”-David Treuer, Los Angeles Times “Midge is a wry, astute charmer with an eye for detail and an ear for the scruffy rhythms of American lingo.”-Sarah Vowell, author of Lafayette in the Somewhat United States "[A] cornucopia of literary brilliance. The Standing Rock Sioux writer’s wickedly funny autobiography offers laugh-out-loud passages alongside compassionate profiles, bitter sarcasm, and heartbreaking chronicles. Each of the memoirs are short yet potent, compelling the reader to continue while paradoxically causing one to pause to reflect on Midge’s astute observations. Every entry is so well-crafted that the only disappointment you’ll find is when you realize you’ve read them all. Then again, this is a book that demands to be reread."-Ryan Winn, Tribal College Journal of American Indian Higher Education "If you're wondering why the presence of Andrew Jackson's portrait in the Oval Office is offensive, this is your book."-Kirkus "Bury My Heart at Chuck E. Cheese’s is timely reading for the fall season, with Midge suggesting "Politically Correct Alternatives to Culturally Insensitive Halloween Costumes," and proclaiming "Hey America, I’m Taking Back Thanksgiving." Treat yourself to a fast-moving correction of any vestiges you may have of the stoic, unsmiling Native stereotype and enjoy at least a Tweet or a one-liner from Tiffany Midge. You’re sure to learn something as you laugh."-Jan Hardy, Back in the Stacks "This collection of opinion editorials and recent essays solidifies Midge's standing as one of the most versatile talents in Native and American writing today."-Samantha Majhor, American Indian Culture and Research Journal "[Midge's] no-b.s., take-no-prisoners approach is likely to resound with twenty-something readers, but the older crowd ought to give Midge a look, too."-Joan Curbow, Booklist "Abundant with brilliant satire."-Shelf Awareness “Tiffany Midge is the kind of funny that can make the same joke funny over and over again. Which means, of course, that she is wicked smart, and sly, and that she has her hand on the pulse of the culture in a Roxane Gay-ish way, only funnier, and that she has our number, your number, and my number too, all of our numbers. Which means she is our teacher, if we let her be.”-Pam Houston, author of Deep Creek: Finding Hope in the High Country

• Foreword by Geary Hobson    Part I: My Origin Story Is a Cross between “Call Me Ishmael,” a Few Too Many Whiskey Sours Packed in an Old Thermos at the Drive-In Double Feature, and That Little Voice That Says, “You Got This”Bury My Heart at Chuck E. Cheese’s    Headlines    Part II: Instead of a “Raised by Wolves” T-Shirt, Mine Says “Raised by Functioning Alcoholics with Intimacy Phobias & Low Self-Esteem”The Jimmy Report    My Name Is Moonbeam McSwine    The Siam Sequences    Part III: Micro (Aggression) MemoirsFirst World (Story) Problems: Brown Girl Multiple Choice Edition    Tweets as Assigned Texts for Native American Studies Course    Ghoul, Interrupted    Part IV: Garsh Durn It! You Say Patriarchy, I Say Patri-Malarkey, Dollars to Donuts Cuckoo Banana Pants, You Gals & Your Lady Power This ’n’ ThatAn Open Letter to White Women Concerning The Handmaid’s Tale and America’s Historical Amnesia    Fertility Rites    Wonder Woman Hits Theaters, Smashes Patriarchy    Jame Gumb, Hero and Pioneer of the Fat-Positivity Movement    Post-Election Message to the 53 Percent    Committee of Barnyard Swine to Determine Fate for Women’s Health    Champion Our Native Sisters! (but Only Selectively and under Certain Conditions)     An Open Letter to White Girls Regarding Pumpkin Spice and Cultural Appropriation    Part V: Me, Cutting in Front of All the People in All of the Lines Forever: “It’s Okay, I Literally Was Here First” #DecolonizedAFThousands of Jingle Dress Dancers Magically Appear at Standing Rock Protector Site    Satire Article Goes Viral on Day of 2016 Presidential Election Results    Attack of the Fifty-Foot (Lakota) Woman    Minnesota Art Gallery to Demolish “Indian Uprisings” Exhibit after Caucasian Community Protest    Why I Don’t Like “Pussy” Hats    Li-Li-Li-Li-Land, Standing Rock the Musical!     Part VI: Merciless Indian Savages? Try Merciless Indian Fabulous!Redeeming the English Language (Acquisition) Series    Fifty Shades of Buckskin    Conversations with My Lakota Mom    Feast Smudge Snag    Eight Types of Native Moms    Part VII: “Shill the Pretendian, Unfav the Genuine” Is the 2018 Remix of “Kill the Indian, Save the Man”Red like Me: I Knew Rachel Dolezal Back When She Was Indigenous    A List of Alternative Identities to Try for Fun and Profit    I Have White Bread Privilege    Things Pseudo-Native Authors Have Claimed to Be but Actually Are Not    You Might Be a Pretendian    Part VIII: I Watched Woman Walks Ahead and Frankly Was Offended by the Cookie-Cutter, Stereotypical Portrayal of the Menacing White SoldierReel Indians Don’t Eat Quiche: The Fight for Authentic Roles in Hollywood    Are You There, Christmas? It’s Me, Carol!    Post-Election U.S. Open in Racist Tirades Competition    West Wing World    Part IX: The Native Americans Used EVERY Part of the Sacred TurkeyHey America, I’m Taking Back Thanksgiving    Clown Costumes Banned, Racist Native American Halloween Costumes Still Okay    Thanksgiving Shopping at Costco: I Just Can’t Even    Politically Correct Alternatives to Culturally Insensitive Halloween Costumes    Part X: BREAKING NEWS-Your Neighbor Who Said, “Whoa, Dude, This Whole Trump Thing’s, Like, So Fricken Surreal,” Might Actually Be on to SomethingStep Right Up, Folks    Trump Pardons Zombie Apocalypse    There’s Something about Andrew Jackson    Trump Administration to Repeal Bison as First National Mammal    President Trump Scheduled for Whirlwind Tour to Desecrate World’s Treasures    Part XI: The Trump Administration’s Pop-Up, Coloring, Scratch ’n’ Sniff, Edible, and Radioactive Activity BookYou’ve Got Mail!    Executive Order Requiring All Americans Take Up Cigarettes by End of 2017    The Wild West (Wing) and Wild Bill Hiccup    Give a Chump a Chance    Ars Poetica by Donald J. Trump    Acknowledgments