Leaning

"...Reading Ron Pelias's autoethnographic poems, stories, and essays, I feel as though I have been invited to sit down on a comfortable couch, by a crackling fire, wine in hand, with a good friend. Ron takes me into his confidences as he tells about his life and relationships, those he's been in as well as those he has observed. I become aware of presence and absence. I feel the touch of a hand, see a side glance, hear a word spoken, or not, the silences both calming and deadly. I lean in, listen, sense, and tell back my stories. You too will recognize yourself in Ron's stories and poems as you confront the power of languaging, the complexities of communicating, the expectations of masculinity, the care and danger in holding and letting go of friends, lovers, and family members. You will feel connected, held, leaned into, as though Ron is writing to and about you--your passions, frustrations, victories in relating; to and about you--disappointing others, getting along, leaning in, and trying to learn how to love and accept the love of others."...- Carolyn Ellis, University of South Florida "Pelias uses autoethnography, poetic inquiry, performative writing, and personal narrative to describe how bodies move--lean--together, placing themselves "in relationship to other bodies"...he encourages us to listen and be mindful of our relational ties, to understand the "fragility of connection," and to never give up trying to figure out what and who matters." --Tony E. Adams, Northeastern Illinois University

• Part 1 Languaging Relationships; Chapter 1 Some Substantiated and Unsubstantiated Claims for Communication; Chapter 2 Relational Language; Chapter 3 Struggling for Speech; Chapter 4 Relational Associations; Chapter 5 Stephen Dunn and the Poetics of Living; Part II Listening to Myself and Others; Chapter 6 Self-Portrait; Chapter 7 Reading Barthes as a Lover; Chapter 8 Walking and Writing With Laurel Richardson; Chapter 9 Three Tales of Understanding; Part III Watching Men; Chapter 10 Making My Masculine Body Behave; Chapter 11 Jarheads, Girly Men, and the Pleasures of Violence; Chapter 12 A Personal History of Lust on Bourbon Street; Part IV Holding Friends and Lovers; Chapter 13 The Pull and Push of Friendship; Chapter 14 Evidence of Love; Chapter 15 Relational Development and Deterioration; Chapter 16 Holding Mimi; Part V Carrying Family; Chapter 17 Family Lessons; Chapter 18 Stories We Do and Do Not Tell; Chapter 19 Remains; Chapter 20 Loss;