Edmund Fitzgerald – författare

Welcome to the here and now. Welcome to a world where dodgy officials dip their beaks in the public till, and where greedy bankers continue to profit from the inane investment strategies which have brought the banking system - and society in general - to its knees. Come bear witness to the obscenely remunerated football stars who think they are God's gift, but act like common louts. Where chavish misogynists ditch their freshly pregnant playthings and move on to debase fresh meat, and where E unbangupableE career cheats and criminals walk the streets, encouraged by their mind-numbingly successful appeals to the out-of-touch wigs presiding over the European courts. It seems everybody is at it. And these toe-rags do it for one simple reason: because they can. Theyll keep getting away with their abhorrent behaviour because what they do isnt always illegal; just obnoxious, loathsome and plain antisocial. For which there exists no effective remedy. Against a background of economic collapse, high unemployment and gloomy news in general, there are too many of a privileged position who derive their pleasure from urinating over the rest of us while they smirk into their glasses of Dom Perignon. No retribution. No redress. These selfish individuals are the new untouchables. But enough is enough. When true justice fails the people, the people turn to the new kid on the block: YourComeUppance.com. The new vox populi. An altruistic white knight, or a darkening nightmare? Whichever it is, you really wouldn't want your name to feature in the YCU Hall of Shame. Because that's a serious life threatening proposition ... as some creatures out there are discovering to their ultimate cost. Maybe there is justice in this world after all. Justice - YCU style.

Dave loved Michelle more than life itself. But when, at 40, he finds himself alone, he can no longer cope. Big Al and James, concerned that their friend might top himself, need to formulate a rescue plan; and fast. Spanish language classes, a crash course in the traditional Andalusian dance of sevillanas and a week of fiesta in Sevilla ought to do the trick. Brilliant! ItE s a project requiring preparation, and in the case of tall, ungainly, rugby fanatic Big Al, a large dollop of humiliation as "e;second row forwards donE t do bleedinE flamenco"e;. With Osama bin Laden dead and the Arab Spring having reached its zenith, al-Qaeda splits into two factions. There may be a more intelligent way to Islamicise the decadent west. But could the AQALAN Initiative be strangled at birth, and the world thrown into turmoil, by a seemingly innocuous spat between two men attending a sevillanas dance class in south London?