Martin Kantor MD – författare

Problems and Solutions is a concise guide for beginning psychotherapists who have mastered basic theory and technique and are now preparing to run psychotherapy sessions. It has one simple premise: a direct and clear therapist will have a more positive impact on a patient. Finding that equilibrium between theory and practice, Martin Kantor uses a practical no-nonsense approach to identify specific therapeutic problems and offer effective, doable solutions. Problems are those faced by all therapists and solutions, while very specific, are not bound to any particular school of thought and easily adaptable to different psychotherapies. Word-by-word emphasis is placed on what to say as well as what not to say. Specific guidance is given on handling symptoms such as delusions, hallucinations, and obsessions. Geared to beginning psychotherapists, Problems and Solutions also offers the advanced therapist an opportunity to reflect on his/her ingrained notions and habits.With more than twenty years of experience in training psychotherapists, Dr. Kantor has written a guide that is both unique and inviting. He offers problem/solution guidance in an elementary and concrete form. His intent is the development of a therapy technique which is direct, open, and understandable. Kantor covers: patient selection, disorder detection and diagnosis, treatment goals, advantages and disadvantages of different treatment modes, technical proficiency, long term therapy, defense mechanisms, transference and countertransference. He also gives extensive attention to the avoidance of common therapeutic errors and the treatment of special situations, such as schizophrenia, specific age groups, and symptoms with a physical caste. Time is also given to basic questions such as the length and frequency of sessions, fees, and office appearance.

This book describes the depressive in his or her natural habitat, studies the everyday problems that cause one's depression, and develops treatment approaches directed to the depressive's real-world plight. It explores the borderland between the sacred and the profane, the academic and the popular, the scientific but impractical, and the practical but unscientific. It relies as much on common sense, anecdote, and individual insight as it does on case histories and psychological test protocol.The book is divided into four sections: description, cause, prevention, and treatment. The descriptive section presents the mental-status abnormalities in depression, includes a differential diagnosis of classic depressive symptoms, indicates when so-called classic symptoms of another disorder are in fact depressive, lists the physical complaints that are the product of depression, discusses normal depression, and touches briefly on hypomania. The section on cause recognizes that real troubles are common and chemical troubles rare. It suggests that people do not get depressed because they are under stress or they have suffered loss, but, in simple language, because their boss has threatened to fire them, their wife has threatened to leave, the cat has died, and other similar real-life difficulties. It faces the problems that therapists and patients alike find unpalatable, shameful, and threatening--the things that cause patients to close their eyes or speak in remote euphemisms. The sections on prevention and therapy are not attached to any one school of thought. They are formulated and expressed simply and humanistically, and offer common-sense solutions to the depressives's everyday problems with themselves and their world.

This innovative book explains writer's block (and other creative blocks) as a symptom of a larger disorder. These disorders can affect all creative and would-be creative people. This book is the first to treat writer's block from a classic, DSM-IV diagnostic perspective. Kantor identifies 10 kinds of writer's block, classified according to the underlying disorder that causes that block. Included in the text is a discussion of the general characteristics of blockage and how the therapist can distinguish between acute and chronic forms of block, as well as an exploration into the causes of block. With this book, Kantor has laid the foundation for the development of a successful treatment approach. Throughout the text, case studies drawn from historical sources and the author's patients illustrate the various kinds of block.

The new federal guidelines to help employers understand how the Americans with Disabilities Act applies to employees with an emotional disorder make it imperative that occupational psychologists and front line managers identify those workers who have an emotional disorder and distinguish them from those workers who are lazy or have a bad attitude. Kantor provides vital clinical information that assists professional consultants and supervisors alike in complying with the new guidelines while distinguishing true disability from behavioral problems which call for administrative action. Avoiding stress-heavy theory and one-size-fits-all approaches to treating occupational disorders, Kantor provides a comprehensive view of factors contributing to workplace traumas and presents an incremental approach to developing correct disgnoses and effective clinical therapies. Kantor describes both the familiar and the less familiar occupational disorders, shows how they develop as a result of dysfunctional interaction between workers and their environment, and suggests case-specific methods for preventing and curing many of the most debilitating workplace traumas.Avoiding stress-heavy theory and one-size-fits-all approaches to treating occupational disorders, the author here provides a comprehensive view of factors contributing to workplace traumas and presents an incremental approach to developing effective clinical therapies. Kantor describes both the familiar and the less familiar occupational disorders, shows how they develop as a result of dysfunctional interaction between workers and their environment, and suggests case-specific methods for preventing and curing many of the most debilitating workplace traumas.

Emotional problems do not discriminate according to sexual orientation. Therefore, gay men have the same emotional difficulties as everyone else. When emotional problems in gay men are viewed solely as the product of sociopolitical events, it limits the therapeutic intervention to correction. Dr. Kantor asserts that the gay-aware supportive therapist can treat the emotional problem with a positive result by meeting the needs of the individual patient with a diagnosis-based treatment approach.Supportive psychotherapy for gay men with emotional problems can eliminate a broad range of emotional difficulties that are not exclusive to gay men. It shows therapists how psychological problems can be buried in a gay context and guides them to recognition and dynamic evaluation that forms the basis of a treatment plan that is simultaneously affirmative, supportive, and corrective.

Kantor focuses on a misunderstood but common condition that brings severe and pervasive anxiety about social contacts and relationships. He offers psychotherapists a specific method for helping avoidants overcome their fear of closeness and commitments, and offers a guide for avoidants themselves to use for developing lasting, intimate, anxiety-free relationships.Fear of intimacy and commitment keeps avoidants from forming close, meaningful relationships. Types of avoidants can include confirmed bachelors, femme fatales, and people who form what appear to be solid relationships only to tire of them and leave with little warning, often devastating their partners/victims. Kantor takes us through the history of this disorder, and into clinical treatment rooms, to see and hear how avoidants think, feel, and recover. He offers psychotherapists a specific method for helping avoidants overcome their fear of closeness and commitments, and offers a guide for avoidants themselves to use for developing lasting, intimate, anxiety-free relationships.The avoidance reduction techniques presented in this book recognize that avoidants not only fear criticism and humiliation, but also fear being flooded by their feelings and being depleted if they express them. Acceptance is feared as much as rejection, because avoidants fear compromising their identity and losing personal freedom. Kantor describes the different therapeutic emphasis required for the four types of avoidants, including those who are withdrawn due to shyness and social phobia, such as people who intensely fear public speaking; those who relate easily, widely, and well, but cannot sustain relationships due to fear of closeness; those whose restlessness causes them to leave steady relationships, often without warning; and those who grow dependent on—and merge with—a single lover or family member and avoid relating to anyone else.

In this insightful book, the author vividly takes the reader inside the minds of people who are paranoid: experiencing delusions of persecution ranging from thinking others are out to get them to falsely believing they have physical illness. Kantor also explains to us other facets of the Paranoid Personality, including suspiciousness, hypersensitivity, extreme vigilance, simmering anger, and a tendency to blame others for and absolve oneself of almost everything. How does such paranoia affect one's life? Whether one is a paranoiac wanting to recover from the emotional disorder, or a person looking for the best way to deal with a paranoid husband, wife, friend, boss, or acquaintance, this book offers understanding and guidance. As Kantor explains, the term paranoid should not be used as a hurtful epithet. Paranoid individuals are no more or less evil than persons with any other emotional disorder, or for that matter, persons with a physical disorder. Paranoia is a disorder of the mind, not a flaw of character, says Kantor.Paranoid individuals are not invariably social misfits. They are found in all walks of life and in all professions, suffering from this disorder that distorts behavior and affects those with whom they come in contact, often in devastating ways. Politicians who write attack ads, spouses who beat or kill their partners, people in road or supermarket rage incidents are all among the possibly paranoid, as are students who perpetrate violence at their schools and fired employees who wreak violence at their former workplaces. Recognizing and treating paranoid behaviors can prevent or reduce antisocial activity and violence against individuals and society.

Is there a mild psychopath near you? Or in you? If so, what can and should you do? Find out in this riveting exploration of a personality disorder usually dismissed by the mental health profession, and never before the topic of in-depth scholarly exploration. We all recognize the true, full-blown psychopaths—the Hitlers, Stalins and Gacys of the world. But what professionals and lay people, alike often do not recognize is that we are surrounded by mild psychopaths, people who do not reach the level of their infamous counterparts, yet still share some of their traits. Fifteen-time author Kantor, a psychiatrist whose last work, Understanding Paranoia, also zeroed in on everyday problems, explains how to recognize, understand and cope with the mild psychopaths one encounters every day.Who are these everyday psychopaths? They are politicians who lie to get votes, swindlers who phish the Internet to steal identities, salesmen who push cars or other products they know are lemons, businessmen who dupe the public in ways that barely skirt the law, doctors who perform unnecessary surgery because they need the money. The list goes on. Some would argue that each of us must use some of the means of the mild psychopath to be successful in life. Where is the line, and what do you do when those around you cross it? The Psychopathy of Everyday Life helps you decide.Kantor spotlights and disproves widely-held beliefs about mild psychopathy, then shows us methods to deal with such people, and such traits in ourselves. His conclusions and vignettes drawn from the treatment room and from everyday life, for example, show that psychopathy is a widespread problem, not one confined to low life' people in jails, or to men and women in mental hospitals. Psychopaths are not all failures in life who could be labled either bad' or mad;' many are quite successful and held up as models. And they are not all guilt-free with no conscience; some do want to escape their aggressive and socially harmful world where being honest, forthright and ethical is abnormal. Kantor offers an eclectic approach based on classic therapies to facilitate help and self-help methods for the victim and the psychopath.

Depression in men often goes undiagnosed or improperly treated because of unique qualities that make it different from depression in women. In this volume, Dr. Kantor explains that depression in men is not strictly the product of major life events; it also regularly appears in response to minor troubling issues that often go entirely overlooked by others or, if recognized at all, are downplayed. In this jargon-free text, Kantor explains how many men are able to navigate the big stresses successfully only to succumb to the little ones. And he challenges the current widespread tendency now viewing depression in men as a strictly biological event to be treated first and foremost with pharmaceuticals.Psychiatrist Martin Kantor takes us into his treatment rooms and daily experience to show the signs and causes of depression in men, and how they do not display the disorder most often in the way we typically associate with depression. Many men who feel depressed deny it by shifting into hypomania. Trying to hide, reject or downplay the feeling, they may become excessively elated, have a decreased need for sleep, find their thoughts racing and their sexual desire fueled out of control. Where there was, initially with depression, a withdrawal and a desire to weep, then enters attention-seeking behavior, clowning and flighty energy, explains Kantor. That makes the depression far more difficult for laypeople and professionals—even for the men themselves—to recognize and deal with. That is unfortunate because a small amount of medical attention and personal affection can work wonders, rechanneling the man into a life of happiness he might never have known, and a level of achievement he might never othewise have attained, says KantorLong thought to be a feminine disorder connected to hormones and the premenstrual syndrome, depression actually strikes millions of men each year. With absorbing vignettes, and insights into a faulty culture that urges men to always have a stiff upper lip and shun medical attention, Dr. Kantor shows the unique ways in which depression is very much a men's disorder. And he helps us understand what we can do to treat it, to help ourselves and the men we care about recover.

Is there a mild psychopath near you? Or in you? If so, what can and should you do? Find out in this riveting exploration of a personality disorder usually dismissed by the mental health profession, and never before the topic of in-depth scholarly exploration. We all recognize the true, full-blown psychopaths—the Hitlers, Stalins and Gacys of the world. But what professionals and lay people, alike often do not recognize is that we are surrounded by mild psychopaths, people who do not reach the level of their infamous counterparts, yet still share some of their traits. Fifteen-time author Kantor, a psychiatrist whose last work, Understanding Paranoia, also zeroed in on everyday problems, explains how to recognize, understand and cope with the mild psychopaths one encounters every day.Who are these everyday psychopaths? They are politicians who lie to get votes, swindlers who phish the Internet to steal identities, salesmen who push cars or other products they know are lemons, businessmen who dupe the public in ways that barely skirt the law, doctors who perform unnecessary surgery because they need the money. The list goes on. Some would argue that each of us must use some of the means of the mild psychopath to be successful in life. Where is the line, and what do you do when those around you cross it? The Psychopathy of Everyday Life helps you decide.Kantor spotlights and disproves widely-held beliefs about mild psychopathy, then shows us methods to deal with such people, and such traits in ourselves. His conclusions and vignettes drawn from the treatment room and from everyday life, for example, show that psychopathy is a widespread problem, not one confined to low life' people in jails, or to men and women in mental hospitals. Psychopaths are not all failures in life who could be labled either bad' or mad;' many are quite successful and held up as models. And they are not all guilt-free with no conscience; some do want to escape their aggressive and socially harmful world where being honest, forthright and ethical is abnormal. Kantor offers an eclectic approach based on classic therapies to facilitate help and self-help methods for the victim and the psychopath.

Kantor focuses on a misunderstood but common condition that brings severe and pervasive anxiety about social contacts and relationships. He offers psychotherapists a specific method for helping avoidants overcome their fear of closeness and commitments, and offers a guide for avoidants themselves to use for developing lasting, intimate, anxiety-free relationships.Fear of intimacy and commitment keeps avoidants from forming close, meaningful relationships. Types of avoidants can include confirmed bachelors, femme fatales, and people who form what appear to be solid relationships only to tire of them and leave with little warning, often devastating their partners/victims. Kantor takes us through the history of this disorder, and into clinical treatment rooms, to see and hear how avoidants think, feel, and recover. He offers psychotherapists a specific method for helping avoidants overcome their fear of closeness and commitments, and offers a guide for avoidants themselves to use for developing lasting, intimate, anxiety-free relationships.The avoidance reduction techniques presented in this book recognize that avoidants not only fear criticism and humiliation, but also fear being flooded by their feelings and being depleted if they express them. Acceptance is feared as much as rejection, because avoidants fear compromising their identity and losing personal freedom. Kantor describes the different therapeutic emphasis required for the four types of avoidants, including those who are withdrawn due to shyness and social phobia, such as people who intensely fear public speaking; those who relate easily, widely, and well, but cannot sustain relationships due to fear of closeness; those whose restlessness causes them to leave steady relationships, often without warning; and those who grow dependent on—and merge with—a single lover or family member and avoid relating to anyone else.

This book describes the depressive in his or her natural habitat, studies the everyday problems that cause one's depression, and develops treatment approaches directed to the depressive's real-world plight. It explores the borderland between the sacred and the profane, the academic and the popular, the scientific but impractical, and the practical but unscientific. It relies as much on common sense, anecdote, and individual insight as it does on case histories and psychological test protocol.The book is divided into four sections: description, cause, prevention, and treatment. The descriptive section presents the mental-status abnormalities in depression, includes a differential diagnosis of classic depressive symptoms, indicates when so-called classic symptoms of another disorder are in fact depressive, lists the physical complaints that are the product of depression, discusses normal depression, and touches briefly on hypomania. The section on cause recognizes that real troubles are common and chemical troubles rare. It suggests that people do not get depressed because they are under stress or they have suffered loss, but, in simple language, because their boss has threatened to fire them, their wife has threatened to leave, the cat has died, and other similar real-life difficulties. It faces the problems that therapists and patients alike find unpalatable, shameful, and threatening--the things that cause patients to close their eyes or speak in remote euphemisms. The sections on prevention and therapy are not attached to any one school of thought. They are formulated and expressed simply and humanistically, and offer common-sense solutions to the depressives's everyday problems with themselves and their world.

Kantor's objective in this book is to help Washington, the Veterans Administration (VA) staff, the vets themselves, and the general public understand the shortcomings of VA medicine today beyond what they read in the newspapers, so that all concerned can chip in to help improve the medical care that all the vets, and not just those returning from Iraq and Afghanistan, are receiving. He reveals exactly how everyone—Washington, veterans, advocacy groups, the various members of the VA staff (including the doctors), the nonmedical and medical administration, the clerks and the rest of the ancillary staff, and the vets themselves—are all together responsible for the breakdown of the system, as he argues that all contribute a share to creating that endpoint: a severe state of havoc with the vets' medical care.Kantor goes on to describe some of the signature illnesses from which vets suffer, and in the process pinpoints exactly how the system specifically manages to mismanage these ailments, making already serious medical problems even worse. In addition, the author envisions a more ideal VA of the future, bringing forth specific improvements that will assure its implementation. The book concludes with a description of the more positive aspects of the system, offering a platform upon which meaningful reforms can be built.

Ten years after he first brought us the book Homophobia, which laid bare the harsh realities and harmful effects of this sexual bigotry, psychiatrist Martin Kantor delves again into prejudice and discrimination—even flat-out acts of absolute hatred—against gays in the United States. Have things changed? One might think so. Ten years ago Matthew Shephard was strung up to die on a fence because he was gay. But no such blatant hatred has made headlines here since the turn of the millennium. Ten years ago, Pat Robinson authored a book that assured lasting peace would only occur when a group including drug dealers, assassins, worshippers of Satan, and homosexuals are no longer on top. Yet, by 2007, Robinson was pledging support for pro-gay Republican presidential candidate Rudy Giuliani. And gays only longing for a formal relationship a decade ago are now entering into civil unions, even gay marriage, in states that have legalized the ceremonies. Hate crime laws have been revised to include gays, and gays are now recognized in domestic partner clauses common across insurance polices. People appear open about homosexuality in the media; gays are featured on television shows and in movies alongside straights. The advances seem great.But they are only surface advances, cautions Kantor. Because the consequences of hate crimes are a lot more severe than they used to be, gays and lesbians are being hunted down and beaten up less frequently than they once were. But people are still full of hate, just more wary of punishment so more circumspect about how they express it. In this new edition, Kantor tells in harsh detail how and why people still fire off slurs like faggot and dyke, and threaten harm, from blowing up their homes to bashing in their heads. Kantor takes us across sites in America - from city streets to hospitals, schools, broadcast stations, and churches to police departments—showing how homophobia is still very much alive. While the problem may be less acute it is still chronic, and while it may not take as many lives, it ruins perhaps even more, he explains. Homophobia is a phenomenon that in significant respects parallels mental illness, adds the psychiatrist. Education alone will not stem the homophobic tide. We also need to uncover and treat the psychoneurotic dimension of homohatred. Yes, we can admire the changes in homophobia over the last decade, but we must not forget or ignore the fact that the human beings who create homophobia haven't changed that much even over the centuries.

Ten years after he first brought us the book Homophobia, which laid bare the harsh realities and harmful effects of this sexual bigotry, psychiatrist Martin Kantor delves again into prejudice and discrimination—even flat-out acts of absolute hatred—against gays in the United States. Have things changed? One might think so. Ten years ago Matthew Shephard was strung up to die on a fence because he was gay. But no such blatant hatred has made headlines here since the turn of the millennium. Ten years ago, Pat Robinson authored a book that assured lasting peace would only occur when a group including drug dealers, assassins, worshippers of Satan, and homosexuals are no longer on top. Yet, by 2007, Robinson was pledging support for pro-gay Republican presidential candidate Rudy Giuliani. And gays only longing for a formal relationship a decade ago are now entering into civil unions, even gay marriage, in states that have legalized the ceremonies. Hate crime laws have been revised to include gays, and gays are now recognized in domestic partner clauses common across insurance polices. People appear open about homosexuality in the media; gays are featured on television shows and in movies alongside straights. The advances seem great.But they are only surface advances, cautions Kantor. Because the consequences of hate crimes are a lot more severe than they used to be, gays and lesbians are being hunted down and beaten up less frequently than they once were. But people are still full of hate, just more wary of punishment so more circumspect about how they express it. In this new edition, Kantor tells in harsh detail how and why people still fire off slurs like faggot and dyke, and threaten harm, from blowing up their homes to bashing in their heads. Kantor takes us across sites in America - from city streets to hospitals, schools, broadcast stations, and churches to police departments—showing how homophobia is still very much alive. While the problem may be less acute it is still chronic, and while it may not take as many lives, it ruins perhaps even more, he explains. Homophobia is a phenomenon that in significant respects parallels mental illness, adds the psychiatrist. Education alone will not stem the homophobic tide. We also need to uncover and treat the psychoneurotic dimension of homohatred. Yes, we can admire the changes in homophobia over the last decade, but we must not forget or ignore the fact that the human beings who create homophobia haven't changed that much even over the centuries.

In this insightful book, the author vividly takes the reader inside the minds of people who are paranoid: experiencing delusions of persecution ranging from thinking others are out to get them to falsely believing they have physical illness. Kantor also explains to us other facets of the Paranoid Personality, including suspiciousness, hypersensitivity, extreme vigilance, simmering anger, and a tendency to blame others for and absolve oneself of almost everything. How does such paranoia affect one's life? Whether one is a paranoiac wanting to recover from the emotional disorder, or a person looking for the best way to deal with a paranoid husband, wife, friend, boss, or acquaintance, this book offers understanding and guidance. As Kantor explains, the term paranoid should not be used as a hurtful epithet. Paranoid individuals are no more or less evil than persons with any other emotional disorder, or for that matter, persons with a physical disorder. Paranoia is a disorder of the mind, not a flaw of character, says Kantor.Paranoid individuals are not invariably social misfits. They are found in all walks of life and in all professions, suffering from this disorder that distorts behavior and affects those with whom they come in contact, often in devastating ways. Politicians who write attack ads, spouses who beat or kill their partners, people in road or supermarket rage incidents are all among the possibly paranoid, as are students who perpetrate violence at their schools and fired employees who wreak violence at their former workplaces. Recognizing and treating paranoid behaviors can prevent or reduce antisocial activity and violence against individuals and society.

Emphasizing diagnosis, causality, and holistic treatment, this is the only book offering a full discussion of Avoidant Personality Disorder for therapists and sufferers.Avoidant Personality Disorder (AvPD) is an extremely widespread, devastating disorder that generally goes unrecognized or misrepresented by what little scientific literature there is on the topic. Therapists are left mystified about how to diagnose and treat it, and patients and other sufferers are at a loss as to what is wrong and how to go about correcting it.The Essential Guide to Overcoming Avoidant Personality Disorder is the only book available to guide both patients and those trying to help them. This thorough and much-needed volume explores the development of AvPD and presents a holistic view of its causes from the psychoanalytic, cognitive-behavioral, and interpersonal perspectives. It offers an extensive section on diagnostic criteria that will be useful to sufferers and therapists, and it discusses the various therapies for AvPD. Finally, and perhaps most critically, the book provides a section intended as a guide for psychiatrists—and a self-help guide for sufferers—including a day-by-day, one-step-at-a-time, monthly guide on how to overcome AvPD.

Emphasizing diagnosis, causality, and holistic treatment, this is the only book offering a full discussion of Avoidant Personality Disorder for therapists and sufferers.Avoidant Personality Disorder (AvPD) is an extremely widespread, devastating disorder that generally goes unrecognized or misrepresented by what little scientific literature there is on the topic. Therapists are left mystified about how to diagnose and treat it, and patients and other sufferers are at a loss as to what is wrong and how to go about correcting it.The Essential Guide to Overcoming Avoidant Personality Disorder is the only book available to guide both patients and those trying to help them. This thorough and much-needed volume explores the development of AvPD and presents a holistic view of its causes from the psychoanalytic, cognitive-behavioral, and interpersonal perspectives. It offers an extensive section on diagnostic criteria that will be useful to sufferers and therapists, and it discusses the various therapies for AvPD. Finally, and perhaps most critically, the book provides a section intended as a guide for psychiatrists—and a self-help guide for sufferers—including a day-by-day, one-step-at-a-time, monthly guide on how to overcome AvPD.

This book is an invaluable resource manual and survival guide for gay men who often turn to peers, parents, educators, or the media for direction, only to encounter misleading myths about gay life, such as the notion that "coming out solves everything."For some gay men being homosexual is often anything but "gay." What are typically assumed to be "gay attributes" are often not characteristics of being gay but symptoms of common emotional disorders in gay men.In this insightful book, longtime psychiatrist Martin Kantor—who is himself a gay man and has been in a committed relationship for 27 years—documents the issues associated with coming out and the challenges of gay relationships, including friendship, marriage, "getting dumped," and sexuality, with unflinching and honest candor. He also addresses the emotional problems and pervasive sense of loneliness that frequently haunt gay men while examining subcultural issues which exist within the gay community, including ageism. Other topics include developing a gay lifestyle (being gay in a certain way), parental relationships, issues of midlife and aging, and therapy and self-help options for gay men who feel they need it.

This book is an invaluable resource manual and survival guide for gay men who often turn to peers, parents, educators, or the media for direction, only to encounter misleading myths about gay life, such as the notion that "coming out solves everything."For some gay men being homosexual is often anything but "gay." What are typically assumed to be "gay attributes" are often not characteristics of being gay but symptoms of common emotional disorders in gay men.In this insightful book, longtime psychiatrist Martin Kantor—who is himself a gay man and has been in a committed relationship for 27 years—documents the issues associated with coming out and the challenges of gay relationships, including friendship, marriage, "getting dumped," and sexuality, with unflinching and honest candor. He also addresses the emotional problems and pervasive sense of loneliness that frequently haunt gay men while examining subcultural issues which exist within the gay community, including ageism. Other topics include developing a gay lifestyle (being gay in a certain way), parental relationships, issues of midlife and aging, and therapy and self-help options for gay men who feel they need it.

Written by a longtime psychiatrist who is himself gay, this unique guide will help parents deal with discovering they have a gay son, allowing them to more comfortably "come out of their closet as their son comes out of his."This is the first book to focus on the parents of gay sons and the mixed feelings they may have following a son's revelation that he is gay. On the one hand, parents want to be honest and open both about and with their son. On the other, they sometimes wish to cover up or ignore their son's sexuality—then are ashamed of themselves for feeling that way. The goal of this book is to enable parents to come to terms with such complex emotions so they can enjoy a genuine, positive relationship with a gay son.Using examples from the author's psychiatric practice and from his interactions with friends and relatives with gay sons, the first section of the book discusses the issues parents face, or think they will face, raising a gay son. The second part analyzes the causes of problems, while the third provides "therapy" devoted to helping parents manage and resolve negative or contradictory feelings and uncertainty. A bonus chapter suggests ways gay sons can help their parents parent them in a supportive, mutually beneficial way.

Written by a longtime psychiatrist who is himself gay, this unique guide will help parents deal with discovering they have a gay son, allowing them to more comfortably "come out of their closet as their son comes out of his."This is the first book to focus on the parents of gay sons and the mixed feelings they may have following a son's revelation that he is gay. On the one hand, parents want to be honest and open both about and with their son. On the other, they sometimes wish to cover up or ignore their son's sexuality—then are ashamed of themselves for feeling that way. The goal of this book is to enable parents to come to terms with such complex emotions so they can enjoy a genuine, positive relationship with a gay son.Using examples from the author's psychiatric practice and from his interactions with friends and relatives with gay sons, the first section of the book discusses the issues parents face, or think they will face, raising a gay son. The second part analyzes the causes of problems, while the third provides "therapy" devoted to helping parents manage and resolve negative or contradictory feelings and uncertainty. A bonus chapter suggests ways gay sons can help their parents parent them in a supportive, mutually beneficial way.

Despite an abysmal "success rate," practitioners still use reparative therapy in an attempt to turn gays and lesbians straight. This text exposes the pitfalls that should be considered before gays embark on this journey that typically leads nowhere.Although homosexuality is becoming less stigmatized in American culture, gays and lesbians still face strong social, familial, financial, or career pressures to "convert" to being heterosexuals. In this groundbreaking book, longtime psychiatrist Martin Kantor, MD—himself homosexual and once immersed in therapy to become "straight"—explains why so-called "reparative therapy" is not only ineffective, but should not be practiced due its faulty theoretical bases and the deeper, lasting damage it can cause.This standout work delves into the history of reparative therapy, describes the findings of major research studies, and discusses outcome studies and ethical and moral considerations. Author Kantor identifies the serious harm that can result from reparative therapy, exposes the religious underpinnings of the process, and addresses the cognitive errors reparative therapy practitioners make while also recognizing some positive features of this mode of treatment. One section of the book is dedicated to discussing the therapeutic process itself, with a focus on therapeutic errors that are part of its fabric. Finally, the author identifies affirmative eclectic therapy—not reparative therapy—as an appropriate avenue for gays who feel they need help, with goals of resolving troubling aspects of their lives that may or may not be related to being homosexual, and of self-acceptance rather than self-mutation.

Despite an abysmal "success rate," practitioners still use reparative therapy in an attempt to turn gays and lesbians straight. This text exposes the pitfalls that should be considered before gays embark on this journey that typically leads nowhere.Although homosexuality is becoming less stigmatized in American culture, gays and lesbians still face strong social, familial, financial, or career pressures to "convert" to being heterosexuals. In this groundbreaking book, longtime psychiatrist Martin Kantor, MD—himself homosexual and once immersed in therapy to become "straight"—explains why so-called "reparative therapy" is not only ineffective, but should not be practiced due its faulty theoretical bases and the deeper, lasting damage it can cause.This standout work delves into the history of reparative therapy, describes the findings of major research studies, and discusses outcome studies and ethical and moral considerations. Author Kantor identifies the serious harm that can result from reparative therapy, exposes the religious underpinnings of the process, and addresses the cognitive errors reparative therapy practitioners make while also recognizing some positive features of this mode of treatment. One section of the book is dedicated to discussing the therapeutic process itself, with a focus on therapeutic errors that are part of its fabric. Finally, the author identifies affirmative eclectic therapy—not reparative therapy—as an appropriate avenue for gays who feel they need help, with goals of resolving troubling aspects of their lives that may or may not be related to being homosexual, and of self-acceptance rather than self-mutation.

This unprecedented work is an invaluable resource for therapists treating patients with obsessive-compulsive personality disorder (OCPD), for individuals suffering from OCPD, and for friends, family, and coworkers of those with OCPD.Although a significant number of individuals suffer from obsessive-compulsive personality disorder (OCPD), most of these people see themselves as being perfectly normal. In actuality, they are missing out in life due to their being compulsively prompt, counterproductively perfectionistic, and excessively penurious. This book explains what OCPD is, making it clear how it differs significantly from OCD; explains the thought processes and desires that give rise to the counterproductive defense mechanisms of OCPD; and identifies the approaches and methods that can allow such afflicted individuals to break through their character armoring and become rehumanized.In this book, Martin Kantor, MD, presents information to defuse the many manifested symptoms of OCPD: anxiety, indecision, unreasonable perfectionism, and difficulty in compromising. His explanations and methods will give the hopeless succor, move the stalled forward, and foster interpersonal cooperation and flexibility in the stubborn, while simultaneously enhancing the OCPD individual's social performance thus increasing his or her chances for interpersonal, relational, and occupational success. Kantor also identifies the social manifestations of OCPD and describes how to move idiosyncratic, rigid bureaucracies toward accomplishing what should be their most important mission: helping those who are in need and seeking comfort.

This unprecedented work is an invaluable resource for therapists treating patients with obsessive-compulsive personality disorder (OCPD), for individuals suffering from OCPD, and for friends, family, and coworkers of those with OCPD.Although a significant number of individuals suffer from obsessive-compulsive personality disorder (OCPD), most of these people see themselves as being perfectly normal. In actuality, they are missing out in life due to their being compulsively prompt, counterproductively perfectionistic, and excessively penurious. This book explains what OCPD is, making it clear how it differs significantly from OCD; explains the thought processes and desires that give rise to the counterproductive defense mechanisms of OCPD; and identifies the approaches and methods that can allow such afflicted individuals to break through their character armoring and become rehumanized.In this book, Martin Kantor, MD, presents information to defuse the many manifested symptoms of OCPD: anxiety, indecision, unreasonable perfectionism, and difficulty in compromising. His explanations and methods will give the hopeless succor, move the stalled forward, and foster interpersonal cooperation and flexibility in the stubborn, while simultaneously enhancing the OCPD individual's social performance thus increasing his or her chances for interpersonal, relational, and occupational success. Kantor also identifies the social manifestations of OCPD and describes how to move idiosyncratic, rigid bureaucracies toward accomplishing what should be their most important mission: helping those who are in need and seeking comfort.

Passive Aggressive Personality Disorder (PAPD) is now recognized as a distinct personality disorder. Those who suffer from PAPD are sorely in need not only of diagnostic recognition, but also of specific therapeutic intervention. This new book from Martin Kantor speaks to therapists; guides those who interact with passive-aggressive individuals to advance their own effective coping methods based on science, understanding, and compassion; and directly addresses passive-aggressive individuals themselves.Contrary to what is implied in the American Psychiatric Association's Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition (DSM-5), and what some practitioners have believed in recent years, new thinking points to passive-aggression being a full disorder. A counterrevolution is now occurring, with some of the most centrist of authors participating in a concerted drive to bring back the diagnosis as being one of the fundamental personality disorders—indeed, a disorder that describes individuals with a distinctly troublesome personality. In this new book, Martin Kantor—a Harvard-trained psychiatrist and noted author of numerous medical texts—takes a new look at passive-aggression and passive-aggressive personality disorder (PAPD) that precisely and scientifically defines it in terms of description, causality, and therapeutic intervention, all based on recent theoretical findings.Kantor makes a powerful argument that passive-aggression can only be reliably identified by answering three fundamental questions, the answers to which define the disorder: why these patients get so angry; why these patients cannot express their anger directly; and what anger styles they employ to express their aggressions. His examination of passive-aggression, which involves two people enmeshed with each other, logically takes two distinct points of view: that of the passive-aggressive individual, and that of his or her "victim" or "target." Specific clinical observation is presented to clarify theory. The book explains how passive-aggression can develop into a complex dyadic interaction in which it is difficult to determine who is doing what to whom, who started it, and what path to take to deescalate; and how using mutual understanding and healthy empathy plus compassion can preclude getting involved in sadomasochistic mutual provocation. The author also suggests ways for those who suffer from passive-aggression to be less hypersensitive, and to express what hypersensitivity they can't help feeling more directly, rather than via the various unhealthy anger styles that constitute the passive-aggressive modus operandi.

Passive Aggressive Personality Disorder (PAPD) is now recognized as a distinct personality disorder. Those who suffer from PAPD are sorely in need not only of diagnostic recognition, but also of specific therapeutic intervention. This new book from Martin Kantor speaks to therapists; guides those who interact with passive-aggressive individuals to advance their own effective coping methods based on science, understanding, and compassion; and directly addresses passive-aggressive individuals themselves.Contrary to what is implied in the American Psychiatric Association's Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition (DSM-5), and what some practitioners have believed in recent years, new thinking points to passive-aggression being a full disorder. A counterrevolution is now occurring, with some of the most centrist of authors participating in a concerted drive to bring back the diagnosis as being one of the fundamental personality disorders—indeed, a disorder that describes individuals with a distinctly troublesome personality. In this new book, Martin Kantor—a Harvard-trained psychiatrist and noted author of numerous medical texts—takes a new look at passive-aggression and passive-aggressive personality disorder (PAPD) that precisely and scientifically defines it in terms of description, causality, and therapeutic intervention, all based on recent theoretical findings.Kantor makes a powerful argument that passive-aggression can only be reliably identified by answering three fundamental questions, the answers to which define the disorder: why these patients get so angry; why these patients cannot express their anger directly; and what anger styles they employ to express their aggressions. His examination of passive-aggression, which involves two people enmeshed with each other, logically takes two distinct points of view: that of the passive-aggressive individual, and that of his or her "victim" or "target." Specific clinical observation is presented to clarify theory. The book explains how passive-aggression can develop into a complex dyadic interaction in which it is difficult to determine who is doing what to whom, who started it, and what path to take to deescalate; and how using mutual understanding and healthy empathy plus compassion can preclude getting involved in sadomasochistic mutual provocation. The author also suggests ways for those who suffer from passive-aggression to be less hypersensitive, and to express what hypersensitivity they can't help feeling more directly, rather than via the various unhealthy anger styles that constitute the passive-aggressive modus operandi.

Explains the subtle but pervasive aspects of sadomasochism that affect everyday relationships across our lives, detailing when the power and control dynamics become neurotic and describing actions that can be taken to better individuals and improve society.For most people, a whip-wielding, leather-clad sexual subculture comes to mind when they hear the phrase "sadomasochism." But as psychiatrist Martin Kantor explains in this book, sadomasochism is generally about power, control, dominance, and submission, dynamics that are subtle and pervasive in all of our lives, from home life to work life to social interactions including political arenas. The bottom line: sadomasochism is about the giving or receiving pleasure from the infliction or reception of pain or humiliation and both pain and pleasure can be purely emotional, no sexual or physical context necessary. Kantor deconstructs sadomasochism to show us how it affects each of us, consciously or not. He explains the "life phases" of sadomasochism, the role early trauma plays in this self-defeating action when it reaches a neurotic level, and the damage it does to individuals, loved ones, and society. This ground-breaking book will appeal to psychology students and researchers, as well as general readers with an interest in psychology.