Matthew Norman – författare

This is a book for the sports lover.Some of us spend too much time in the shed listening to sport on the radio and hogging the television. The thing about sports lovers is that we hate so much about it, we shout at the radio and the television; we love sport so much that if any of it makes us cross, it makes us FURIOUS. So this is a book for us, the sports loving angry brigade.So, introducing: Frank Lampard; badge kissing (Frank Lampard); Neville Neville, for producing the Neville brothers (sparing his lovely daughter, who is a terrific hockey player); Ally McCoist; John Fashanu; Gary Player; Gavin Henson; Sebastian Coe; Lewis Hamilton (obviously); Cristiano Ronaldo; Tim Henman; 'Beefy' and 'Lamby' adverts; Tim Henman's mother; dressage; Tim Henman's father; Pro-celebrity golf (which Tim Henman plays); Will Carling; Fatima Whitbread; the truly awful Sir Clive Woodward; Torville and Dean; Joey Barton; national anthems; Peter Crouch; grunting female tennis players; Nigel Mansell; Paul Ince (Incy); ); Mark Lawrensen; the fella in the Union Jack outfit at sporting events, particularly cricket, who I think is dead now; Tony Blair for his heading thing with Kevin Keegan; SIR Nick Faldo (for goodness sake); Matthew Hayden (a self-professed devout Christian off the field, a sneering bully on it); Dwain Chambers; opening ceremonies; David O'Leary; Argentinian polo players; Ashley Cole; Sports Personality of the Year Award (used to be so fantastic, terrible now); Ron Atkinson - you know why; Prince William and Prince Harry; Cliff Richard (the reason they got the roof); the haka; Will Carling; Peter Alliss - very very bad, possibly evil, a very big contender for the number one spot; Max Moseley; certainly Bernie Ecclestone; Billy Bowden and his stupid signals ('Jesus is the third umpire in my life'); American golf fans who shout out 'in the hole'; the green jacket; the Barmy Army.

This is a book for the sports lover.In an Orwellian Ministry of Sport, what ultimate terror would await you in Room 101? Would Tim Henman's choking crush the spirit sooner than the glacial detachment of his parents? Would the philandering of an Ashley Cole or a Will Carling break you faster than the pipe-smoking prissiness of bowlsman David Bryant or the obese bare-chested Geordie football fan in winter? Would it be Neville Neville's unrepentant siring of Phil that cracked you, or the Charidee Fun Runner doing the marathon in the guise of Spiderman? The nasally overexcited John Motson or the mellifluously smug Peter Alliss? How do you rank the self-pitying lunacy of Arsène Wenger against Alex Ferguson's psychotic ranting? Or the shameful innumeracy of referee Graham Poll against umpire Billy Bowden's sinister crook-finger?Counting down the greatest torments in sport from 101 to number one has been a filthy job. But someone had to do it.

“Reminiscent of Richard Russo’s earlier work. . . . Wonderfully fast-paced, hilariously genuine, difficult to put down . . . an ideal first novel.” —Booklist Tom Violet always thought that by the time he turned thirty-five, he’d have everything going for him. Fame. Fortune. A beautiful wife. A satisfying career as a successful novelist. A happy dog to greet him at the end of the day. The reality, though, is far different. He’s got a wife, but their problems are bigger than he can even imagine. And he’s written a novel, but the manuscript he’s slaved over for years is currently hidden in his desk drawer while his father, an actual famous writer, just won the Pulitzer Prize for Fiction. His career, such that it is, involves mind-numbing corporate buzzwords, his pretentious arch-nemesis Gregory, and a hopeless, completely inappropriate crush on his favorite coworker. Oh . . . and his dog, according to the vet, is suffering from acute anxiety. Tom’s life is crushing his soul, but he’s decided to do something about it. (Really.) Domestic Violets is the brilliant and beguiling story of a man finally taking control of his own happiness— even if it means making a complete idiot of himself along the way. “Thoroughly entertaining.” —Publishers Weekly “A fast, fun, hilarious read.” —Jessica Anya Blau, author of The Summer of Naked Swim Parties and Drinking Closer to Home “Domestic Violets leaves the reader satisfied by the intriguing plot written in a comic spirit; it also endears the author and hero to the reader for maximum poignancy.” —New York Journal of Books “All this misery makes for good comedy . . . charmingly drawn.” —Washington Post

Essential ColdFusion fast gives the reader a working knowledge of ColdFusion and how to use it and how it integrates with other web-based technologies. Lots of working examples are included throughout, all of which are also available via a web-site that is powered by ColdFusion, which shows exactly how they work.Matthew Norman has written a ''get started quick'' guide to ColdFusion, in the style of the Essential series, describing the setting up of a development system. He talks about how to achieve this on a budget, using techniques that are applicable to large scale operations as well.Anyone with a working knowledge of the internet, and who wants to learn more about what ColdFusion does and how they can start using it quickly, will find this book a real help.

Databases are now an integral part of the internet and many web sites use databases in the background to control their content. MySQL is one of the most commonly used open source database management systems. Due to it’s bundling with PHP, MySQL has proved a popular choice for many sites as it enables a database driven, content managed website to be set up with little or no software costs. This book will show you how to design and use databases for the web using MySQL as a tool to learn SQL. Key Topics Installing and testing MySQL SQL basics, and using SQL to communicate with databases Database design techniques and concepts Using MySQL with PHP, Apache and Perl How to make other products communicate with MySQL Features and Benefits. Gives an insight into how databases work in relation to the web. Introduces general SQL techniques by means of MySQL. Explains the concepts behind a structured query language and how it can be used to communicate with databases. Provides an introduction to database design and how an efficiently designed database can improve the performance of MySQL.

Essential ColdFusion fast gives the reader a working knowledge of ColdFusion and how to use it and how it integrates with other web-based technologies. Lots of working examples are included throughout, all of which are also available via a web-site that is powered by ColdFusion, which shows exactly how they work.Matthew Norman has written a 'get started quick' guide to ColdFusion, in the style of the Essential series, describing the setting up of a development system. He talks about how to achieve this on a budget, using techniques that are applicable to large scale operations as well.Anyone with a working knowledge of the internet, and who wants to learn more about what ColdFusion does and how they can start using it quickly, will find this book a real help.

Databases are now an integral part of the internet and many web sites use databases in the background to control their content. MySQL is one of the most commonly used open source database management systems. Due to it�s bundling with PHP, MySQL has proved a popular choice for many sites as it enables a database driven, content managed website to be set up with little or no software costs. This book will show you how to design and use databases for the web using MySQL as a tool to learn SQL. Key Topics Installing and testing MySQL SQL basics, and using SQL to communicate with databases Database design techniques and concepts Using MySQL with PHP, Apache and Perl How to make other products communicate with MySQL Features and Benefits. Gives an insight into how databases work in relation to the web. Introduces general SQL techniques by means of MySQL. Explains the concepts behind a structured query language and how it can be used to communicate with databases. Provides an introduction to database design and how an efficiently designed database can improve the performance of MySQL.

Databases are now an integral part of the internet and many web sites use databases in the background to control their content. MySQL is one of the most commonly used open source database management systems. Due to it’s bundling with PHP, MySQL has proved a popular choice for many sites as it enables a database driven, content managed website to be set up with little or no software costs. This book will show you how to design and use databases for the web using MySQL as a tool to learn SQL. Key Topics Installing and testing MySQL SQL basics, and using SQL to communicate with databases Database design techniques and concepts Using MySQL with PHP, Apache and Perl How to make other products communicate with MySQL Features and Benefits. Gives an insight into how databases work in relation to the web. Introduces general SQL techniques by means of MySQL. Explains the concepts behind a structured query language and how it can be used to communicate with databases. Provides an introduction to database design and how an efficiently designed database can improve the performance of MySQL.

A couple determined not to end up like their divorced friends try a radical experiment—and get in way over their heads—in this hilarious, heartfelt novel from the author of We’re All Damaged. The Core Four have been friends since college: four men, four women, four couples. They got married around the same time, had kids around the same time, and now, fifteen years later, they’ve started getting divorced around the same time, too. With three of the Core Four unions crumbling to dust around them, Jessica and Mitch Butler take a long, hard look at their own marriage. Can it be saved? Or is divorce, like some fortysomething zombie virus, simply inescapable? To maximize their chance at immunity, Jessica and Mitch try something radical. Their friends’ divorces mostly had to do with sex—having it, not having it, wanting to have it with other people—so they decide to relax a few things. Terms are discussed, conditions are made, and together the Butlers embark on the great experiment of taking their otherwise happy, functional marriage and breaking some very serious rules. Jessica and Mitch are convinced they’ve hit upon the next evolution of marriage. But as lines are crossed and hot bartenders pursued, they each start to wonder if they’ve made a huge mistake. What follows is sexy, fun, painful, messy, and completely surprising to them both. Because sometimes doing something bad is the only way to get to the heart of what’s really good.