Onward Workbook

ELENA AGUILAR is the founder and president of Bright Morning Consulting, an educational consulting group that works around the world supporting educators to meet the needs of children. She is the author of The Art of Coaching and The Art of Coaching Teams and has also been a longtime contributor to Edutopia and EdWeek.

• Preface xviiIntroduction 1Put On Your Hiking Boots 1Hopes and Goals 2Current Challenges 3What’s in Your Toolbox? 4Create a Treasure Chest, or Just a Pocket 51 Know Yourself 7Know Yourself: Resilience Self-Assessment 8How Well Do I Know Myself? 10The Wise Words of Martha Graham 13Whom Do You Know Who Knows Who They Are? 14I Am 15Purpose: Why I’m Doing This 16Myers-Briggs Personality Types: Part 1 17Myers-Briggs Personality Types: Part 2 21Pablo Neruda and Purpose 23What Motivates Me When I Speak? 24Core Values 25Purpose: My Legacy 28Crafting a Mission Statement 30I Am a Leopard, or a 33Aptitudes and Interests 34Aptitudes: An Inquiry Experience 40Spiritual and Mental Ancestors 45The Paths We’ve Taken 46Values: At School 48Sociopolitical Identities 50Signature Strengths 52Make a Values Jar 53Astrology, Enneagrams, and More! 54Behavioral Change: In the Past 55Who Am I? Who Do I Want to Be? 57Behavioral Change: Reflections on Past Experiences 59Behavioral Change: Identifying Grain Size 62Making Plans for Behavioral Change 64Aligning Values to Actions 67A Letter to Vulnerability 69Artistic Depictions of Vulnerability 70Destination Postcard: Self-Knowledge 71Chapter Reflection 722 Understand Emotions 75Understand Emotions: Resilience Self-Assessment 76KWL: Emotions 78Beliefs About Feelings 79Examining Coping Mechanisms 81Movie Time! 82The Cultural Construction of Emotions 84The Core Emotions 86Naming Emotions 88Exploring the Intensity of Emotions 89Anger: Meditations and Reflections 92Get to Know an Emotion Cycle 94A Day of Observing Your Emotions 97Relaxing Your Body: The Body Scan 98Where Emotions Live in Your Body 99Muscle Relaxation 100Nonverbal Communication: The Interviews 101The Biography of My Emotions 102Reflecting on Regrets 103Invite Your Emotions to Tea 104Lessons About Strong Emotions 105Thanking Your Emotions 107Thanks, but No Thanks 109Exploring Moments of Emotional Intensity 112How to Breathe 114RAIN: Dealing with Uncomfortable Emotions 116Noticing Physical Cues 118Assessing Your Stress 119Quick Calm: Grounding 120Recognizing Cognitive Distortions 121A Letter to Anger 124Artistic Depictions of Anger 125Destination Postcard: Understand Emotions 126Chapter Reflection 1273 Tell Empowering Stories 129Tell Empowering Stories: Resilience Self-Assessment 130Three Good Things 132Intention Setting 136Start a New Habit 140Reflect on Thoughts 141What Einstein Says About Stories 149Exploring the Impact of Cognitive Distortions 150Catch That Distorted Thought 154Visually Depicting a Life Story 156Affirmations 158Authoring Your Life 159Take Apart That Thought 160Try This Thought 164Optimism: Choices 165Challenge That Thought 166Interrupting Distorted Thoughts 172Problematic Core Beliefs 174Rilke on Love 178Challenge That Core Belief 179“The Optimism of Uncertainty” 181River and Rut Stories 182The Life-Defining Moments 184“Want To” and “Get To” 187The Untold Story 188Memory, Mood, and Story-Crafting 189“The Danger of a Single Story” 190Using Empathy to Expand Stories 191Examining Organizational Stories 193Love 194The Pessimism-Optimism Scale 197Think Like an Optimist 199A Letter to Love 200Artistic Depictions of Love 201Destination Postcard: Tell Empowering Stories 202Chapter Reflection 2034 Build Community 205Build Community: Resilience Self-Assessment 206Community Mapping 208Planning for Professional Community Building 209Develop Cultural Competence: A Plan 211Trust: Reflecting on Experience and Assumptions 213Relational Trust: Among Staff 216How to Build Trust 220Body Language: Reflecting on Myself 224Body Language: Reflecting on Others 227Body Language: Fake It Till You Become It 229Body Language: Rewiring Your Brain 230What Does Community Mean to You? 232Sixty Ways to Build Community at School 235How to Address Conflict 239Neighborhood Exploration 240An Anthropologist in the Lunchroom 241Research Community Outside of School 242A Corsage of Community 244Building Your Social Network 245Storytelling 247Listening to Your Own Listening 248Expansive Listening 250Listening: The Interviews 252Am I in a Toxic Culture? 253What to Say When People Don’t Talk Nicely About Kids or Their Families 257How to Ask Questions 260A Letter to Fear 262Artistic Depictions of Fear 263Destination Postcard: Community 264Chapter Reflection 2655 Be Here Now 267Be Here Now: Resilience Self-Assessment 268The Raisin Meditation 270The Joy Collage 272Right Here, Right Now 273Blowing Bubbles 274Morning Messages 275Mindfulness on Yard Duty 276Mindful Eating 277The Myth of Multitasking 278Mindful Walking 280Tagore on Joy 281Ice Cube Meditation 282A Tree in a Storm 283Project Silliness 284Identify a Choice Point 285Treasure Chest of the Ordinary 286Mindful Breathing 287The “Not-Right-Now” Shelf 289Sixty Seconds 291Meet Your Telomeres 292The Zen of Coloring 293Do Something Already 294Walk a Labyrinth 295Soaking In the Satisfaction 296Project Humor 297Drawing Your Breath 300Kale Is Not Required 302A Letter to Joy 303Artistic Depictions of Joy 304Destination Postcard: Be Here Now 305Chapter Reflection 3066 Take Care of Yourself 309Take Care of Yourself: Resilience Self-Assessment 310Listening to Your Body 312What’s My Gap? 313Dream 315Self-Care Origin Stories 316When You Are in Self-Care Crisis 317Tracking Exhaustion 318Keep a Food Diary 319Reflecting on Martyrdom 321If Your Body Could Talk 322Inside World and Outside World 324Try Something New 326Charting Your Self-Care Story 329Reduce Your Sugar Intake 330Planning for Better Sleep 333How to Get More Exercise 337Movie Time! 338Self-Esteem Reflection 339How Do I Perceive Myself? 341The Best Homemade Chai 343How Do Others Experience Me? 344Exploring Self-Confidence 345Fake It Until You Make It 348Healthy Eating Reminders 350Loving Your Adrenals 352Who Needs to Yell at You? 355Reflecting on Perfectionism 357A Week of Self-Care 358Sixty-Five Ways to Care for Yourself 361A Letter to Perfectionism 364Artistic Depictions of Perfectionism 365Destination Postcard: Self-Care 366Chapter Reflection 3677 Focus on the Bright Spots 369Focus on the Bright Spots: Resilience Self-Assessment 370Find the Bright Spots 372Savor the Little Moments 374Share What You Savor 378Feel the Feelings 379Energy Check-In 380Stop and Smell the Roses 383Tuning in to the Positive 384Create a Remember-lutions Jar 385The Words of Others 386Joyful Anticipation 388Repurpose Your Pain 389Joyful Recollection 390THINK Before You Speak 391Don’t Worry, Be Happy 392The Joy of Making Lists 393Reflecting on Sadness 395Five Years in the Future 396Learning to Settle Your Mind 397Light a Candle 398Gaining Perspective on Difficult Events 399Uncovering Silver Linings 401Watch Your Thoughts, Again 403Photographing What Matters 405In Search of Ordinary Good 406Reflecting on the Search for Ordinary Good 407A Letter to Sadness 408Artistic Depictions of Sadness 409Destination Postcard: Focusing on Bright Spots 410Chapter Reflection 4118 Cultivate Compassion 413Cultivate Compassion: Resilience Self-Assessment 414New Year’s Activities 416Make Those Resolutions Stick 417Lovingkindness Meditation 418An Intention for Today 420Acknowledging Your Teachers 421Six Ways to Forgive Someone 422Bridging Differences 426It’s Not Personal 428How to Apologize 429The Self-Compassion Break 431How Would You Treat a Friend? 432Self-Compassion Letter 434Exploring Cynicism 435The Quest for Good 436Just Like Me 437The Fly on the Wall 438Your Future Self Speaks to You 440Learning from Envy 442Recognizing Bids for Attention 443The Self-Compassion Journal 445Cultivating Compassion for Difficult People 448“The Awesome Anthem” 449Nonviolent Communication 450Nonverbal Communication of Compassion 453The People Who Support Me 454Four Minutes of Eye Contact 455Thirty-Six Questions to Fall in Love with Someone 456Eat Together 459A Meditation to Boost Equanimity 460Preventing Empathic Fatigue 461A Letter to Envy 462Artistic Depictions of Envy 463Destination Postcard: Compassion 464Chapter Reflection 4659 Be a Learner 467Be a Learner: Resilience Self-Assessment 468How Writing Helps You Learn 470Ask a Question 471Super-You 472The Million-Dollar Question: What Can I Learn? 473Action Research: What and Why 474Mini Inquiry Cycle 476Lessons on Learning from Merlin 477Get Rid of Uncomfortable Clothes 478Get Rid of Some More Things 479Piggyback Behaviors 480Parker Palmer’s Words on Learning 481Whom Do I Want as a Mentor? 482How to Find a Mentor 483How to Receive Feedback 484How to Give Feedback 485The One-Sentence Journal 487Indicators of a Learning Organization 488The Power of Yet: A Musical Interlude 491Expanding Your Learning Community 492Cultivating Curiosity: The Art of Noticing 493Growing Brains 494Cultivating Curiosity by Knowing More 495Three Kinds of Curiosity 496Cultivating Curiosity: Backwards 498Beliefs and Assumptions About Time 499Tracking My Time 500What Else Could This Mean? 501A Letter to Shame 502Artistic Depictions of Shame 503Destination Postcard: Being a Learner 504Chapter Reflection 50510 Play and Create 507Play and Create: Resilience Self-Assessment 508Your Play Personality 510Six Ways to Water Your Creativity 511The Closet in My Classroom 513Create a Logo 514Thank You, Courage 516Sisu, Ikigai, and Gigil 517How to Be Courageous 520Street Interviews 521Create Your Alter Ego 522Play Hide-and-Seek 523Create a Monster 524Nondominant Hand Monsters 526The Four-Minute Diary 528Making the Familiar Strange 529Discovering Creativity in Your Community 530A Play List 531Elevate the Ordinary 532Map Your Day 533Create a Community Sketchbook 534Ai Weiwei’s Shoes 535Create Your Cheerleading Squad 536Ice Cube Street Art 538A Collage of Student Voices 539Banksyfy Yourself 540Transforming the Ordinary 541A Family Tree of Courage 542On Creative Resilience and Resistance 543A Letter to Courage 544Artistic Depictions of Flow 545Destination Postcard: Play and Create 546Chapter Reflection 54711 Ride the Waves of Change 549Ride the Waves of Change: Resilience Self-Assessment 550Make a Vision Board 552The Roots of Our Attitude Toward Change 553Face Your Fears 554Reflecting on Hope and Change 555Which Changes Do You Desire? 556Reflecting on Perseverance 557“Maybe,” Said the Farmer 558The Monster in the Closet 560Honoring What You’ve Lost 561Keep a Promise to Yourself 563Detachment Meditation 564Reflecting on Energy 565Transformation and Decay 566Metaphors for Patience 567How the Light Gets In 568Silence 569Scream and Yell 570Patience 571Accepting Fragility 572It’s All Right to Cry 573Strengthening Your Intuition 574Inspiration to Fight the Good Fight 576Tackle Your Complaints 577How to Worry Less 580Plan for Change: Observe Others 581Crisis and Opportunity 582Dragonflies 583Your Own Change Management Model 584A Letter to Patience 585Artistic Depictions of Patience 586Destination Postcard: Riding the Waves of Change 587Chapter Reflection 58812 Celebrate and Appreciate 591Celebrate and Appreciate: Resilience Self-Assessment 592Gratitude Journals 594A Visual Gratitude Journal 595Everyone I’m Grateful For 596A Flurry of Appreciations 597Honoring the Ancestors 599Deep Gratitude 600The Power of the Positive Phone Call Home 601Exploring Attitudes Around Celebration 603Talk About People Behind Their Backs 604One Little Thought: My Life Is Very Blessed 605The Heartbreak of Teaching 606A Gratitude Letter 607What Sets Your Soul on Fire? 608Enlisting an Accountability Buddy 610Time Traveling to Deliver Appreciations 611Today, I Am Grateful For 612What’s at Risk? 613Awe Boosts Your Immune System 614Strengthen a Friendship 615The Awe Narrative 616Movie Time! 617Live as If You Liked Yourself 618Thank You, Elbows 619Capture Awe in Nature 620My Yearbook Page 621I Would Like to Be More Grateful For 622An Awe Walk 623Look Around You 624A Letter to Awe and Wonder 625Artistic Depictions of Awe 626Destination Postcard: Trust 627Chapter Reflection 628Conclusion 629Reflecting on a Year of Cultivating Resilience 630Symbols and Metaphors for Dispositions 631Choosing Dispositions 637Create a Poster 638Now What? 639Appendix: Resources for Further Learning 641About the Author 650