Tom Holt – författare

''Highly amusing ... Eloquently snarky prose'' - Publishers Weekly''Inventively entertaining ...make you both laugh out loud and stop and think'' - SFXWhen the Supreme Being and his son decide that being supreme isn''t for them any more, it''s inevitable that things get a bit of a shake-up.It soon becomes apparent that our new owners, the Venturi brothers, have a very different perspective on all sorts of things. Take Good and Evil, for example. For them, it''s an outdated concept that never worked particularly well in the first place.Unfortunately, the sudden disappearance of right and wrong, while welcomed by some, raises certain concerns amongst those still attached to the previous team''s management style.In particular, there''s one of the old gods who didn''t move out with the others. A reclusive chap, he lives somewhere up north, and only a handful even believe in him.But he''s watching. And he really does need to know if you''ve been naughty or nice.What would happen if good and evil were replaced with a more dynamic system based on sound economic principles? Find out in Tom Holt''s wickedly funny new comic novel!Books by Tom Holt: Walled Orchard Series Goatsong The Walled Orchard J.W. Wells & Co. Series The Portable Door In Your Dreams Earth, Air, Fire and Custard You Don''t Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It Helps The Better Mousetrap May Contain Traces of Magic Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Sausages YouSpace Series Doughnut When It''s A Jar The Outsorcerer''s Apprentice The Good, the Bad and the Smug Novels Expecting Someone Taller Who''s Afraid of Beowulf Flying Dutch Ye Gods! Overtime Here Comes the Sun Grailblazers Faust Among Equals Odds and Gods Djinn Rummy My Hero Paint your Dragon Open Sesame Wish you Were Here Alexander at World''s End Only Human Snow White and the Seven Samurai Olympiad Valhalla Nothing But Blue Skies Falling SidewaysLittle PeopleSong for NeroMeadowlandBarkingBlonde BombshellThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side

''Uniquely twisted . . . cracking gags'' - Guardian''Holt doesn''t skimp on the flashes of brilliance'' - SFX''Clever, funny, tirelessly inventive'' - Christopher MooreWINTER IS COMING, SO WHY NOT GET AWAY FROM IT ALL?Being the Dark Lord and Prince of Evil is not as much fun as it sounds, particularly if you are a basically decent person. King Mordak is just such a person. Technically he''s more goblin than person, but the point is that he is really keen to be a lot less despicable than his predecessors. Not that the other goblins appreciate Mordak''s attempts to redefine the role. Why should they when his new healthcare program seems designed to actually extend life expectancy, and his efforts to end a perfectly reasonable war with the dwarves appear to have become an obsession? With confidence in his leadership crumbling, what Mordak desperately needs is a distraction. Perhaps some of these humans moving to the Realm in search of great homes at an affordable price will be able to help? An Orc on the Wild Side is the latest comic masterpiece from one of the funniest writers in fantasy.Books by Tom Holt: J.W. Wells & Co. Series The Portable Door In Your Dreams Earth, Air, Fire and Custard You Don''t Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It Helps The Better Mousetrap May Contain Traces of Magic YouSpace Series Doughnut When It''s A Jar The Outsorcerer''s Apprentice The Good, the Bad and the Smug Other recent novelsBlonde BombshellLife, Liberty and the Pursuit of SausagesThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side

Welcome to Dawson, Ahriman & Dawson!*The team of commercial sorcerers at Dawson, Ahriman & Dawson can help with any metaphysical engineering project, large or small. (Though by definition, they all tend to be pretty large.)They can also create massive great puddles of chaos that might one day swallow up the entire universe.Take, for example, the decision to recruit a certain bearded fellow whose previous work experience mainly involves reindeer and jingle bells. It might have seemed like a good idea at the time, but is he really the best person to save the world from Tiamat the Destroyer?Find out today in Tom Holt''s brilliantly funny new novel set in the world of The Portable Door (now a delightful movie starring Patrick Gibson, Sophie Wilde, and Christoph Waltz).*By reading beyond this point you agree to comply with certain terms and conditions that are mostly reasonablebut confidential. Dawson, Ahriman & Dawson management reserves the right to terminate any employees or clients, human or otherwise.

From the moment the first Homo Sapiens descended from the trees, possibly onto their heads, humanity has striven towards civilisation. Fire. The Wheel. Running Away from furry things with big teeth and, after a great deal of time, coming back and bravely nuking their descendants from orbit, are all testament to man''s ultimate ascendancy.It is a noble story, a triumph of intelligence over adversity and, of course, completely and utterly wrong.For one man believes he has discovered the hideous truth: that every great civilisation in history has, rather embarrassingly, been founded, run and then cunningly manipulated by a small gang of devious frogs.More information on this book and others can be found on the Orbit website at www.orbitbooks.co.uk

''A definite must for all fans of comic fantasy'' - ENIGMA''Wacky humour bubbles through the polished narrative ... Holt doesn''t skimp on the flashes of brilliance'' - SFXEver been offered a promotion that seems too good to be true? You know - the sort they''d be insane to be offering to someone like you. The kind where you snap their arm off to accept, then wonder why all your long-serving colleagues look secretly relieved, as if they''re off some strange and unpleasant hook ...It''s the kind of trick that deeply sinister companies like J.W. Wells & Co. pull all the time. Especially with employees who are too busy mooning over the office intern to think about what they''re getting into. And it''s why, right about now, Paul Carpenter is wishing he''d paid much less attention to the gorgeous Melze, and rather more to a little bit of job description small-print referring to ''pest'' control ...Books by Tom Holt: Walled Orchard Series Goatsong The Walled Orchard J.W. Wells & Co. Series The Portable Door In Your Dreams Earth, Air, Fire and Custard You Don''t Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It Helps The Better Mousetrap May Contain Traces of Magic Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Sausages YouSpace Series Doughnut When It''s A Jar The Outsorcerer''s Apprentice The Good, the Bad and the Smug Novels Expecting Someone Taller Who''s Afraid of Beowulf Flying Dutch Ye Gods! Overtime Here Comes the Sun Grailblazers Faust Among Equals Odds and Gods Djinn Rummy My Hero Paint your Dragon Open Sesame Wish you Were Here Alexander at World''s End Only Human Snow White and the Seven Samurai Olympiad Valhalla Nothing But Blue Skies Falling SidewaysLittle PeopleSong for NeroMeadowlandBarkingBlonde BombshellThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side

''The best similes since Douglas Adams.'' - SFX''A brilliantly imaginative tale with an unexpected final twist'' - The Good Book Guide''I was eight years old when I saw my first elf.''... And for unlikely hero Michael it wasn''t his last. Michael''s unfortunately (but accurately) named girlfriend Cruella, doesn''t approve of his obsession with the little people, but the problem is that they won''t leave him alone. And who can blame them when it is his own stepfather who is responsible for causing them so much misery. Oh yes. Daddy George knows that elves can do so much more than the gardening.Brilliant and outrageously funny comic fantasy - Tom Holt on top form.Books by Tom Holt:Walled Orchard SeriesGoatsongThe Walled OrchardJ.W. Wells & Co. SeriesThe Portable DoorIn Your DreamsEarth, Air, Fire and CustardYou Don''t Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It HelpsThe Better MousetrapMay Contain Traces of MagicLife, Liberty and the Pursuit of SausagesYouSpace SeriesDoughnutWhen It''s A JarThe Outsorcerer''s ApprenticeThe Good, the Bad and the SmugNovelsExpecting Someone TallerWho''s Afraid of BeowulfFlying DutchYe Gods!OvertimeHere Comes the SunGrailblazersFaust Among EqualsOdds and GodsDjinn RummyMy HeroPaint your DragonOpen SesameWish you Were HereAlexander at World''s EndOnly HumanSnow White and the Seven SamuraiOlympiadValhallaNothing But Blue SkiesFalling SidewaysLittle PeopleSong for NeroMeadowlandBarkingBlonde BombshellThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side

''Tom Holt''s comic fantasy is a great, uplifting read, fit to grace any reader''s book collection'' - Waterstones Books Quarterly''Holt''s quirky characters and whimsical voice successfully infuse life into this entertaining romantic comedy'' - Publishers WeeklyIt touches all our lives; our triumphs and tragedies, our proudest achievements, our most traumatic disasters. Alloyed of love and fear, death and fire and the inscrutable acts of the gods, insurance is indeed the force that binds the universe together.Hardly surprising, therefore, that Frank Carpenter, one of the foremost magical practitioners of our age, felt himself irresistibly drawn to it. Until, that is, he met Jane, a high-flying corporate heroine with an annoying habit of falling out of trees and getting killed. Repeatedly.It''s not long before Frank and Jane find themselves face to face with the greatest enigma of our times: When is a door not a door? When it''s a mousetrap.A madcap comic fantasy from one of Britain''s funniest writers.Books by Tom Holt: Walled Orchard Series Goatsong The Walled Orchard J.W. Wells & Co. Series The Portable Door In Your Dreams Earth, Air, Fire and Custard You Don''t Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It Helps The Better Mousetrap May Contain Traces of Magic Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Sausages YouSpace Series Doughnut When It''s A Jar The Outsorcerer''s Apprentice The Good, the Bad and the Smug Novels Expecting Someone Taller Who''s Afraid of Beowulf Flying Dutch Ye Gods! Overtime Here Comes the Sun Grailblazers Faust Among Equals Odds and Gods Djinn Rummy My Hero Paint your Dragon Open Sesame Wish you Were Here Alexander at World''s End Only Human Snow White and the Seven Samurai Olympiad Valhalla Nothing But Blue Skies Falling SidewaysLittle PeopleSong for NeroMeadowlandBarkingBlonde BombshellThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side

Now a major film starring Sam Neill, Sophie Wilde, Patrick Gibson, Christoph Waltz and Miranda Otto.Starting a new job is always stressful (especially when you don''t want one), but when Paul Carpenter arrives at the office of J. W. Wells he has no idea what trouble lies in store. He is about to discover that the apparently respectable establishment now paying his salary is a front for a deeply sinister organisation. It seems that half the time his bosses are away with the fairies. But they''re not, of course.They''re away with the goblins.''A definite must for all fans of comic fantasy'' - ENIGMA The J.W. Wells & Co. Series: The Portable Door In Your Dreams Earth, Air, Fire and Custard You Don''t Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It Helps The Better Mousetrap May Contain Traces of Magic Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Sausages Other recent titles from Tom Holt: Doughnut When It''s A Jar The Outsorcerer''s Apprentice The Good, the Bad and the Smug The Management Style of the Supreme Beings An Orc on the Wild Side Holt Writing as K. J. Parker: Sixteen Ways to Defend a Walled City How To Rule An Empire and Get Away With It A Practical Guide to Conquering the World

''Read THE WALLED ORCHARD so you can tell your descendants, ''I was there when the historical novel started holding its head up with the rest of literature''''. - WASHINGTON POST''This book is a hilarious yet well-researached historical novel.'' - HISTORICAL NOVEL REVIEWThe hero is Eupolis, weary, cynical and believing only in comedy. The heroine is Athens, at the height of her schizophrenic glory. A startling mixture of comedy and tragedy, THE WALLED ORCHARD is the poignant, charming story of their turbulent relationship.With unforgettable characters and a powerful and moving story, THE WALLED ORCHARD is a wonderful evocation of life in Ancient Greece in the fifth century BC.Books by Tom Holt: Walled Orchard Series Goatsong The Walled Orchard J.W. Wells & Co. Series The Portable Door In Your Dreams Earth, Air, Fire and Custard You Don''t Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It Helps The Better Mousetrap May Contain Traces of Magic Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Sausages YouSpace Series Doughnut When It''s A Jar The Outsorcerer''s Apprentice The Good, the Bad and the Smug Novels Expecting Someone Taller Who''s Afraid of Beowulf Flying Dutch Ye Gods! Overtime Here Comes the Sun Grailblazers Faust Among Equals Odds and Gods Djinn Rummy My Hero Paint your Dragon Open Sesame Wish you Were Here Alexander at World''s End Only Human Snow White and the Seven Samurai Olympiad Valhalla Nothing But Blue Skies Falling SidewaysLittle PeopleSong for NeroMeadowlandBarkingBlonde BombshellThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side

''Frantically wacky and wilfully confusing ... gratifyingly clever and very amusing'' - MAIL ON SUNDAY''Frothy, fast and funny'' - SCOTLAND ON SUNDAYColin Hollinghead is a young man going nowhere fast. Working for his dad might have seemed like a good idea at the time, but starting at the bottom in the widget-making industry has somehow lost its appeal. And now the business is in trouble. At least his father has a plan to turn things round - a new work force that will improve profit margins and secure the company''s future for eternity. The deal looks great on paper, but they do say that the devil is in the detail - and the old rogue certainly seems to be involved in some capacity. Colin needs help. Perhaps his new friend from J.W. Wells & Co. (Practical and Effective Magicians, Sorcerers and Supernatural Consultants) can help. Sparkling with wit and oozing charm, Tom Holt''s new comic caper will delight his readers and prove once and for all that going to work can actually be hell.And now the business is in trouble. At least his father has a plan to turn things round - a new work force that will improve profit margins and secure the company''s future for eternity. The deal looks great on paper, but they do say that the devil is in the detail - and the old rogue certainly seems to be involved in some capacity. Colin needs help. Perhaps his new friend from J.W. Wells & Co. (Practical and Effective Magicians, Sorcerers and Supernatural Consultants) can help.Sparkling with wit and oozing charm, Tom Holt''s new comic caper will delight his readers and prove once and for all that going to work can actually be hell.Books by Tom Holt: Walled Orchard Series Goatsong The Walled Orchard J.W. Wells & Co. Series The Portable Door In Your Dreams Earth, Air, Fire and Custard You Don''t Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It Helps The Better Mousetrap May Contain Traces of Magic Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Sausages YouSpace Series Doughnut When It''s A Jar The Outsorcerer''s Apprentice The Good, the Bad and the Smug Novels Expecting Someone Taller Who''s Afraid of Beowulf Flying Dutch Ye Gods! Overtime Here Comes the Sun Grailblazers Faust Among Equals Odds and Gods Djinn Rummy My Hero Paint your Dragon Open Sesame Wish you Were Here Alexander at World''s End Only Human Snow White and the Seven Samurai Olympiad Valhalla Nothing But Blue Skies Falling SidewaysLittle PeopleSong for NeroMeadowlandBarkingBlonde BombshellThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side

''Frantically wacky and wilfully confusing ... gratifyingly clever and very amusing'' - Mail on Sunday''Frothy, fast and funny'' - Scotland on SundayJ.W. Wells seemed to be a respectable establishment, but the company now paying Paul Carpenter''s salary is in fact a deeply sinister organisation with a mighty peculiar management team. Paul thought he was getting the hang of it (particularly when he fell head over heels for his strangely alluring colleague Sophie), but death is never far away when you work at J.W. Wells. Unlike the stapler - that''s always going awol. Our lovestruck hero is about to discover that custard is definitely in the eye of the beholder. And that it really stings.Tom Holt''s exceedingly comic fantasies are populated with evil goblins, annoying sprites and people like us. However, it''s not always possible to tell the difference.The third book to follow the hilarious adventures of Paul Carpenter - Tom Holt at his inventive best.Books by Tom Holt: Walled Orchard Series Goatsong The Walled Orchard J.W. Wells & Co. Series The Portable Door In Your Dreams Earth, Air, Fire and Custard You Don''t Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It Helps The Better Mousetrap May Contain Traces of Magic Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Sausages YouSpace Series Doughnut When It''s A Jar The Outsorcerer''s Apprentice The Good, the Bad and the Smug Novels Expecting Someone Taller Who''s Afraid of Beowulf Flying Dutch Ye Gods! Overtime Here Comes the Sun Grailblazers Faust Among Equals Odds and Gods Djinn Rummy My Hero Paint your Dragon Open Sesame Wish you Were Here Alexander at World''s End Only Human Snow White and the Seven Samurai Olympiad Valhalla Nothing But Blue Skies Falling SidewaysLittle PeopleSong for NeroMeadowlandBarkingBlonde BombshellThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side

''Tom Holt may be the most imaginative satirist to land on our shores since Douglas Adams'' - Christopher Moore''Holt has a zany humor that will appeal to fans of Terry Pratchett and Christopher Moore.'' - Library JournalMonsters are roaming the streets of London. Of course, some monsters are scarier than others:Unicorns? No bother.Vampires? Big deal.Werewolves? Ho hum.Lawyers? ... Aaargh!Duncan''s boss doesn''t think that he''s cut out to be a lawyer. He isn''t a pack animal. He lacks the killer instinct. But when his best friend from school barges his way back into Duncan''s life, with a full supporting cast of lawyers, ex-wives, zombies and snow-white unicorns, it''s not long before things become distinctly unsettling. Hairy, even.Tom Holt''s latest comic novel is a rollercoaster ride of supernatural silliness and biting satire.Books by Tom Holt: Walled Orchard Series Goatsong The Walled Orchard J.W. Wells & Co. Series The Portable Door In Your Dreams Earth, Air, Fire and Custard You Don''t Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It Helps The Better Mousetrap May Contain Traces of Magic Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Sausages YouSpace Series Doughnut When It''s A Jar The Outsorcerer''s Apprentice The Good, the Bad and the Smug Novels Expecting Someone Taller Who''s Afraid of Beowulf Flying Dutch Ye Gods! Overtime Here Comes the Sun Grailblazers Faust Among Equals Odds and Gods Djinn Rummy My Hero Paint your Dragon Open Sesame Wish you Were Here Alexander at World''s End Only Human Snow White and the Seven Samurai Olympiad Valhalla Nothing But Blue Skies Falling SidewaysLittle PeopleSong for NeroMeadowlandBarkingBlonde BombshellThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side