The Rules of People: A personal code for getting the best from everyone

Richard Templar is the author of the international bestselling Rules books. Over 2 million people around the world have enjoyed and now play by Richard Templar's Rules. The complete list of titles is as follows: The Rules of Life, The Rules of Work, The Rules of Management, The Rules of Wealth, The Rules of Parenting, The Rules of Love, The Rules to Break, The Rules of People, The Rules of Thinking, and The Rules of Living Well.

• Understanding people   1 Understanding helps   2 No one has to be like you   3 People hear what they want to hear  4 People believe what they want to believe   5 Your attitude influences their response   6 Remember your first impression   7 People are tribal   8 Everyone wants to feel valued   9 They only tease you if they like you   10 … but banter isn't teasing   11 Everyone else is insecure too   12 Spots don't change   13 Behaviour isn't character   14 Other people's relationships are a mystery   15 Big words are there to impress you   16 Confrontation can be scary   17 People feel nervous because they care   18 Angry people are sad people   19 Crying isn't always sad   20 Some people just don't think   21 Square pegs don't fit in round holes   22 Wild and wacky isn't always fun   23 It's hard being 13   24 They'll shout if you do   25 Responsibility creates independence   26 Teenagers hate you because they love you   27 Talking is what matters   28 Listening is what matters   29 No one likes saying sorry   30 The world is full of rebels   31 Some weirdos are great people     Helping people    32 Put your oxygen mask on first   33 Get in the swamp   34 It's OK just to feel   35 Listen, don't solve   36 Know your limitations   37 It's not a competition   38 Never give advice   39 Accept their decision   40 Give them control   41 Get them to think for themselves   42 Learn to be psychic   43 Listen to what they don't say   44 People who can't find an answer may not want one   45 Don't tell people to move on   46 Loneliness is a state of mind   47 Give them privacy   48 All interactions are positive or negative   49 Not everyone wants help     Getting them on your side   50 Loyalty runs both ways   51 Remember the details   52 Flattery should never be empty   53 Praise effectively   54 Keep your praise in proportion   55 People want to be liked   56 Earn their respect   57 Have a sense of humour   58 Don't be scared to admit your mistakes   59 Be tolerant   60 Make individual relationships   61 Turn the best side to the front   62 People generally agree with themselves   63 Credit people with your own ideas   64 Don't tell them they're wrong (even if they are)   65 Get them to collaborate   66 Be human   67 Share   68 Say thank you properly   69 Get under their skin   70 Criticise constructively   71 Agree without agreeing   72 Let them win   73 Make it three-dimensional   74 Give and take   75 Know what you both want   76 Get all their cards on the table   77 Give them a get-out   78 Never be scared   79 Don't get caught on the hop   Difficult people   80 There's only one person you can change   81 It's scary being controlled   82 If they feel small, they'll big themselves up   83 Shouty people want to be heard   84 Negative people can't half be useful   85 Control freaks know they're right   86 Blackmailers want to control you   87 Insecurity can cause mistrust   88 Prejudice comes from ignorance   89 Martyrs crave recognition   90 Sensitive people can't toughen up   91 People will listen if it's in their interest   92 Passive-aggressive people fear conflict   93 Patronising can be accidental   94 You can't beat a true narcissist   95 Moaners don't want to change   96 Competitive complainers don't just need a whinge   97 Secrets are full of power   98 Some people just can't lose   99 Manipulation is more than just persuasion   100 Busy people are less trouble