Finding Inner Safety

Dr. Nerina Ramlakhan has over 25 years of experience in helping people and organisations thrive by using her unique blend of physiology, psychology, philosophy, professional, and personal insights to create profound shifts in awareness and consciousness. Her work is always practical and she is well-known for sharing ‘small things that make a big difference’. Dr. Nerina Ramlakhan is a wellbeing, sleep and energy expert, and motivational speaker who has worked with individuals, organisations, sports professionals and the media for the past two decades. Her passion is for people to live more peaceful, vital, and fulfilling lives in these chaotic times.

• Message from the Author ixAcknowledgements xxPrologue: Lost and Found xxiiiIntroduction: Why Feeling Safe Matters xxixPart One: The Illusion of Safety 11 What Does Feeling Safe Mean? 3Stuck in Unhelpful Patterns 5When You Don’t Know if You Feel Safe or Not 7Unconsciously Unsafe 9Consciously Unsafe 11Unconsciously Safe 12Consciously Safe 14Four Levels of Safety 16What Does Feeling Safe Mean to You? 20From Outside In, to Inside Out 20Part Two: When the Nervous System Is Nervous 252 Measuring Un-safety in the Human Laboratory 27Skewed Measurements 29A Changing World – Speed, Noise, Demand, Technology 313 Your Intelligent Nervous System 35Introduction to the Key Principles of Safety Science 37A Day in the Life Of 39Polyvagal Theory (Viva Las Vagus!) 44Evolution of Our Nervous System 48Regulation, Co-regulation, Dysregulation 50Habituation to Survival – A Nervous System Perspective 52Sensing Our Inner and Outer World 54Meanings Matter 58Social Engagement (and Wearing Masks) 59All Alone Together 61Reality Shows and Frozen ‘Perfection’ 68Safety in Connection 70Part Three: Nature Cures 734 The Wisdom of Trees 75Magnificent Brainforests 79The Tree of Safety 82The Roots of the Tree of Safety 85The Trunk of the Tree of Safety – Life Passages 87The Crown of the Tree of Safety 90The Real Work 925 Going Back to Our Roots 93Early Beginnings 96Weakened Roots 99Where Do You Belong? 105Different Types of Roots 112The Tree That Toppled 113Part Four: Doing the Real Work (of Finding Inner Safety) 119Practices and Resources 119Getting Ready to Do the Work – Before You Get Going 119Practices and Resources Index 1256 Create More Resources – The Reset 127What Are Your Energy Levels Right Now? 130Press the Reset Button 131Getting Started 135Feel Resourced – What to Expect 1387 Aerate the Soil/Soul 139Compacted Breathing 142Learn How to Breathe 143Practice 1: Notice the Breath 149Practice 2: Take 5 a Day/Morning Practice 151Practice 3: Sigh it Out 1528 Return to the Body – Embodiment Work 155Practice 1: Notice Your Body Awareness 160Practice 2: Locate Your Trigger Points 161Practice 3: Feel Joy and Pleasure 163Practice 4: Sense Your Environment 165Practice 5: Take a Walk in Nature 167Practice 6: Jump Back into Your Body – Heel Drops 168Practice 7: Discover Chi Kung Shaking 170Practice 8: Find Comfort and Ease 1719 Can I Show You Who I Am? 175Practice 1: Identify Your Inner Perfectionist 180Practice 2: Mirror Work 183Practice 3: Let it Out! 18710 Strengthen the Positivity Bias of the Brain 191Practice 1: Gratitude for the Present Moment 197Practice 2: Wake up with Gratitude 199Practice 3: End Your Day with Gratitude 199Practice 4: Cultivate Appreciation 200Practice 5: Soak in Pleasure 201Practice 6: Morning Intention Setting 20311 Safety in Connection 205Practice 1: Prepare Your Heart Connection 211Practice 2: Meditation for Loneliness 212Practice 3: Deep Support 21412 Healing Weakened Roots 217Practice 1: Explore Your Family Tree 219Practice 2: Tree Meditation Exercise 221Epilogue: Return Home 225About the Author 231Bibliography 233